MISC. PANDEMIC NOTES OF THE WEEK
(an update for my descendants)
Couple of miscellaneous items.
The church is re-opened. While it holds almost 500 people, only 140 will be let in the first week. As always masks must be worn.
I am not going, yon descendants, until church returns to normal. No way can I sing through a mask.
Also, the stock market arose enough for me to get back to where I started earlier this year. That is good news all around.
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MAJOR POLITICAL EVENT OF THE WEEK
(another update)
House of Representatives Holds Hearings, Puts on a Show
I listened to some of the speakers at the hearings in the House of Representatives, heralded to be the introduction of new rules for the police.
It was nothing new. Same old, same old.
Below a picture of various Democrats in congress putting on a show wearing silly African scarves and kneeling down for the same amount of time as George Floyd was held down on the ground, about eight and a half minutes.
Nancy Pelosi was unable to get off of her knees.
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MAJOR CULTURE EVENT OF THE WEEK
(one more update)
Endless Funerals
The biggest cultural event of the year had to be the endless funeral of George Floyd. Not that, yon descendants, there hadn't already been over ten days of constant talk of this event until one wanted to scream.
Read more on this funeral in my editorial below, yon descendants.
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PERSONAL NOTES FROM ME RE THE PANDEMIC
(that my descendants may know how I handled it)
I lose it in the Grocery Store
Yon descendants I must hope you never see my screaming face upon a Youtube video in your lifetimes. Because yon descendants, I went crazy in a grocery story. And somebody got it on video.
But there's a good ending to the story, hang in there.
First, I absolutely hate and despise this thing where when you go into a grocery story, one aisle now requires you only go DOWN, the next one you must go UP....etc. etc. The idea is under this method, everyone would be going the same way and as they follow the cart in front of them, social distancing would be maintained. If the aisles were trafficked the normal way, some carts would be going UP and some DOWN, in the same aisle. Under this method, the way it used to be done, two people would be next to each other as they pass and the virus germs would be crazy with joy as the jump to the cart pusher adjacent to the infected.
Only even with everyone pushing their cart the same way, there is always that idiot in front of you who must stop and assess all diced tomatoes in endless leisure. Social distancing would require that you wait until said shopper chooses the diced tomatoes on sale, the Italian style diced tomatoes and of course, compare all prices.
Most people don't stop and wait but will go around the busy shopper, thus eliminating social distancing for the time it takes to go around.
So the ONE way THIS way of dubbing each aisle really doesn't stop people from being next to each other, at least for time it takes to go around.
And I, yon descendants, find as I age I get more confused about such things and often end up going UP the aisle when it is designated as DOWN. Worse, if I realize my error and try to get back to going the correct way I will have to go UP, DOWN and UP three aisles and me with these awful legs that hate walking.
So I was going in the wrong direction, and I knew it but by then it was too late to turn around and go back, much less travel three to four aisles with legs already aching, to get my aisles straight. So I continued going the wrong way, mentally cussing this stupid King Carney rule that does no good as described above that social distancing is destroyed no matter what way the aisle is directed.
Don't you know some female tells me, to my embarrassment, that I was going the wrong way.
How humiliating is this, yon descendants?
Well I lost it.
I screamed, yon descendants. Screamed. "I AM SO SORRY! I AM GOING THE WRONG WAY! WHAT AN AWFUL PERSON I AM! I AM JUST SO SORRY!" I then pretended to get on my knees to beg. "PLEASE DON'T CALL THE COPS ON ME. I DON'T WANT TO GO TO JAIL!"
The snitch bitch who thought it her job to set the world straight got big eyes and quickly hurried away from my crazy self.
I'm not proud of this, yon descendants. But it felt so good to finally scream at the silliness of it all. The horrible masks that King Carney insists we must wear and like George Floyd, causes me not to be able to breathe. To know that rioters and looters can go down any aisle they want, even go through store windows if they want, and there are no Karens out there telling them to turn around. I noticed out of the side of my eyes that a bunch of people, but of course, from employees to other shoppers, stopped what they were doing and stared at me. Somehow I got in the right aisle and continued UP the next aisle, in the right direction.
When I got to the front of the store, yon descendants you must smile, but all of the cashiers, the customer service offices and many store customers WERE CHEERING ME ON! Some raised their hands, others called me to look at them (cameras were being clicked).....cheers and hoorays.
Seems they were all sick of it too. Except for the Snitch Bitch who was by then I don't know where.
Well I was on a roll. While I continued shopping an automatic voice reminded us shoppers that the aisles were going in one direction only and to watch for them. I would then shout loud , because I'd already lost my reputation, to answer the automatic voice..."BE CAREFUL OF YOUR AISLE DIRECTION SHOPPERS. POLICE WILL BE CALLED AND YOU MIGHT DIE".
This time when I got to the front of the store, the pharmacy section was standing and cheering me on.
We're sick of it, yon descendants. Sick of snitch bitches ready to rid the world of wrong-way-grocery-aisle shoppers, sick that rioters and looters can go anyway they want and don't bother with masks, sick of automatic voices commanding our moves, sick of a silly system that does not work but King Carney controls our lives and we damn well better go down the aisle he says.
And THAT, yon descendants, is this ancestor's story of single-handedly fighting the pandemic like a true American.
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OVER THE INTERNET
(social media explains so much)
Here's how I think requiring masks might work in elementary.
Please don’t snap Billy's mask in his face.
Your mask is not a necklace, bracelet, or any other form of jewelry.
You should not be using your mask as a slingshot. Please put it back on your face.
Please do not chew on your mask.
Your mask should be on your face, not on the back of your head
I’m sorry your mask is wet, but that's what happens when you lick the inside of it.
I’m sorry you sneezed. Here's a tissue. Wipe out the snot as well as you can.
No, you may not blow your nose in your mask.
Why is your mask soaking wet? You just came back from the bathroom?
And you put it back on your face after you dropped it?
I’m sorry you broke the elastic on your mask by seeing how far the band would stretch. Now you'll have to hold the mask on your face ... or use this duct tape.
Please take the mask off your eyes and watch where you're walking. I don’t care if you have X-ray vision.
Please take the mask off of your pencil and stop twirling it.
I know the mask fits over your pants like a knee pad, but please take it off of your leg and put it on your face.
What do you mean you tried to eat your lunch through your mask?
Please don't share your mask or trade masks. I don’t care if you like Ingrid's mask better than yours.
I’m sorry, but your mask is not school appropriate.
We're not comparing our masks to other kids' masks… everyone’s mask is unique and special.
No, you may not decorate your mask instead of doing your work. I don’t care if you have a Sharpie.
You're not a pirate, please take your mask off your eye.
Try to get the gum off as much as you can.
Please don't use your mask to pick your nose.
I’m sorry you tripped, but that’s what happens when you put your feet inside the elastic of your mask.
No, your mask doesn't make it hard to get your work done.
Your Mom will need to get you a new mask since you chewed a hole in that one.
Why is there a shoe print on your mask?
No, you cannot eat the snow through your mask.
I don’t care if you were in art class and being creative; we do not decorate our masks.
We do not beam other kids in the face with balls. No, their masks don’t make it not hurt.
Please don't plug your nose holes with your mask.
Who's making that noise?
I’m sorry your ponytail is stuck, that’s what happens when you see how many times you can wrap it around your mask.
I’m sorry to tell you, but your child thought her mask made her a superhero. She tried to fly off the jungle gym at recess …
I’m sorry your breath stinks in your mask, maybe we should all try to brush better.
Please take those cookies out of your mask. No, you are not a chipmunk.
Another Internet goody below.
-----------------------------------EDITORIAL
(My opinion for my descendants)
Is there such a thing as overkill? The Floyd funeral
The funeral for George Floyd, yon descendants, was long, boring and well....shameful.
Yes the man deserved a good farewell and might I wish him to rest in peace? It was horrible what happened to him but the funeral had absolutely no class and by me, was embarrassing.
I begin with the white horses and carriages for the casket as well as two more such ostentatious funeral getups for family and friends. It looked like a wedding instead of a funeral.
Oh, and the gold casket. Some single-parent Mom could feed her family for a week for what the coffin costs.
These were brought out for travel to the burial site. The funeral before it was just as silly and positively embarrassing.
The singing was awful. Screaming, screeching and out of tune.
The eulogies were okay but one teenager, George Floyd's niece, made a comment meant to endear her to America. "We are told that we should make America great again," this brat begins. "But when was America ever great?"
So okay, maybe she's angry, lost a favorite Uncle and all that. But shouldn't she just have left that bit out.?
And please let's not forget that George Floyd was no perfect person. Darn if the picture of him up on the altar didn't show him with a halo over his head and wings on his back.
Come on. All that nonsense just takes away from the real sobriety the funeral should hold.
And Al Sharpton! Goodness knows this man cannot get enough time in front of a camera.
I'm sorry folks, It lasted SIX HOURS!
Yes, yon descendants, there really is such a thing as overkill.
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TIME FOR A SMILE
2 comments:
Good postt
Hi, nice reading your blog
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