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Quote of the DaySICK JOKE |
| Web Site Worth the Visit Ever wonder what the famous smiley face looks like from the, em, rear? Turn your sound on and enjoy this web illustration. Heh. The Back of the Smiley Face |
| TIDBITS POLICE HUMOR So you thought police officers didn't have a sense of humor? The following were taken off of actual police car videos around the country. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile." "Take your hands off the car, and I'll m ake your birth certificate a worthless document." "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired." "Can you run faster than 1,200 feet per second? In case you didn't know, that is the average speed of a 9mm bullet fired from my gun." "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?" "Yes, Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?" "Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket." "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?" "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey $#*!. " "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven." "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC." "Just how big were those two beers?" "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want." "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail." And my favorite . . . "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here." |
Dig This!
Said to being seriously considered by the military of both the UK and the U.S., this could be the start of something big.
From the Dailymail.com:
Elite special forces troops being dropped behind enemy lines on covert missions are to ditch their traditional parachutes in favour of strap-on stealth wings.
The lightweight carbon fibre mono-wings will allow them to jump from high altitudes and then glide 120 miles or more before landing - making them almost impossible to spot, as their aircraft can avoid flying anywhere near the target.
BeausNotReady.Com
Is there any doubt in anyone's naïve mind that if Beau Biden were not THE son of Delaware's infamous Senator Joe Biden he would not be touted as Delaware's next Attorney General? The guy just got admitted to the bar in 2002!
Whatever Joe Biden wants in this state, Joe Biden gets. Including a very unqualified son placed into a position of great importance for no other reason than the fame of his father.
In an unusual moment, the Delaware Republican party begins to act as if it were an actual separate party from the Democrats. All hands are on board to cast Beau Biden as a totally unqualified State Attorney General, which he is. In a web site began to squash this nepotistic takeover of Delaware's judicial system, the Republican party launched Beau's Not Ready.com:
Not Qualified to serve as Family Court Judge Not Qualified to arbitrate a civil case Not Qualified to be a preceptor to applicants to the Delaware Bar Beau Biden is not ready to be Attorney General
The man, as of this writing, has tried only three criminal cases and as quoted above, does not meet the Delaware Bar Association's minimal standards to arbitrate a civil case in this state. Yet we, the dumb voters, are to believe this youngster should be our next Attorney General?
In fact, Delaware Governor Nanny Minner, from deep within the hip pockets of Joe Biden, tried to ram this snot-nose down our throats all stealth like by trying to appoint him to replace the current Attorney General who recently vacated that position. The uproar was mighty. That really bad idea had Minner appointing another candidate but Beau is the next Democratic candidate for the position. The upshot is that young Beau will need the VOTERS, duh, to appoint him, not the backdoor political appointment ole Joe tried to orchestrate.
Not that there aren't a plethora of Delaware attorneys in this state way more qualified than Beau but alas, their fathers aren't entrenched state Senators.
The Delaware GOP is running just such a fine candidate, Ferris Wharton. Wharton was the prosecutor for the Thomas Capano murder case and hey, go with me on this, is definitely more qualified than Mr. Beau, son of the Senator.
I predict Joe Biden's attempt to shove his son upon the voters of Delaware will backfire big time. Even those voters who pull the lever for Hairplugs will hesitate to translate that support of an experienced and knowledgeable Senator into an unhesitating endorsement of his young son.
Jimmy Carter and Nasty Money
There really is an organization called "Censure Carter.com" and on first blush theirs might seem a lost cause. Never mind the efforts to censure Bush, the notion of censuring a past President is totally new.
Still there's movement afoot with that group and Fox news recently featured an expose on some of James Carter, the worst U.S. President EVER, and some of his questionable contributors.
For a few bucks, Carter, who owns an international diplomacy firm, will verify any election. Carter is buddies with any despot, dictator or creep as winner of an election no matter how imperfect the result. We can thank Carter for Hugo Chavez, who ran the most crooked election in Venezuelan history but there you have it. James Carter, former President of the U.S. and riding on the prestige of that position, will foist nasty leaders upon the earth. For the right price, of course.
Jimmy Carter practices this anti-American subterfuge rather openly and is the bane of elected U.S. Presidents since his own failed presidency. No one has yet been able to stop the man but this dedicated group doesn't give up.
Wednesday May 31st, Fox News Channel's "The Big Story w/ John Gibson" will report on the revelation that former President Jimmy Carter's "Carter Center" in Atlanta, Georgia has received over $1,000,000 in funding from the family of Osama Bin Ladin. The information was collected by the Censure Carter Committee - a project of the pro-troop non-profit group, Move America Forward.
The report will be broadcast at approximately 5:45 PM Eastern / 2:45 PM Pacific.
This is in addition to tens of millions of dollars in funding from Arab governments who are appreciative of Carter's anti-Israeli stance and Carter's opposition to U.S. foreign policy in the Middle East including opposing Operation Iraqi Freedom and opposing the Bush Administration's war on terrorism.
You all remember Carter sitting next to Michael Moore during the Democratic convention? The same Michael Moore who made a movie depicting the Bush administration's relation to the Saudi Bin Laden family? Yet, whoa, look at Carter's connection to the Bin Laden Saudi group!
I'd love to see Jimmy Carter stopped. He poses as a wonderful religious man, working for Habitat for Humanity and all soft-spoken. The man is a traitor of the highest order. Even President Clinton could not stand Carter. He undermines this country's diplomatic policy and he gets paid for it, don't tell me not.
The above Fox program did air as indicated. The fizzle died down. But hey, keep pounding away at the man. Not all of us are fooled by this clever as a fox hayseed.
Merryland Election Officials Quit
Folks, it's not easy to set up a state election system that guarantees a Democratic win. That corrupt bunch in Merryland are giving it a darn good try. For the Merryland citizenry got all uppity and elected a Republican for Governor. Can't have that. Those same citizens might get it into their heads to unelect some of those Free State charlatans that do little but cripple the state economically with their self-serving laws.
Thus we have this five day voting system, the better to bus in "voters" from nearby states and God knows we can't have any such nonsense as a photo voter ID.
Been a long time since the dead voters of Merryland had an updated photo so forget such an ordinary thing as photo ID, something Americans are quite used to during pursuit of their everyday life.
Nearly a third of the nonpartisan elections chiefs in the state have quit in the past year, and some are saying they are leaving over frustration that numerous changes to the voting system could threaten the integrity of the fall elections.
"There is a hole that's left open that people can say it's fraud," said Robin Downs Colbert, a veteran elections official in charge of operations in Prince George's County who's stepping down next month. "It's not that it is fraud, but because there may be a process that (election workers) haven't been prepared for, it can be claimed that there's fraud."
But It Could Be Worse; Dutch Pedophiles Launch Their Own Political Party
Give us time. We'll be there soon.
Because goodness, a 12-year-old child is mature enough to participate in sexual activity so why shouldn't the act be government sanctioned?
To their credit, 82% of the Dutch are against this new political party. Because on some level, no matter how liberal the idealology, I believe that people do want to protect the children.
By allowing our children to become playthings of sexual pedophiles we may as well flush our humanity down the nearest toilet.
What's scary is that a group of these fine folk even have the courage to step forward with their great plan for diversity and sex with animals.
From Yahoo.com:
AMSTERDAM (Reuters) - Dutch pedophiles are launching a political party to Push for a cut in the legal age for sexual relations to 12 from 16 and the Legalization of child pornography and sex with animals, sparking widespread
Outrage.
The Charity, Freedom and Diversity (NVD) party said on its Web site it would
Be officially registered Wednesday, proclaiming: "We are going to shake The
Hague awake!"
The party said it wanted to cut the legal age for sexual relations to 12 and
Eventually scrap the limit altogether.
Ann Coulter Knocks Them Dead With New Book
I've been enjoying the many interviews with Ann Coulter this past week as pundits and the Lamestream journalists try to beat her up with her own words.
From Spin.com:
"These broads are millionaires, lionized on TV and in articles, reveling in their status as celebrities, and talked about by grief-arazzis," she said. "I have never seen people enjoying their husbands' deaths so much."
Heh.
Other more timid bloggers (one is a certain Captain that I normally respect) have bailed out on Ann but let me state right up front that I agree with Ann 100%. Those so-called "Jersey Girls" are opportunists of the highest order. I really believe they were recruited by the Democratic party to push that joke of a Clinton-apologist 9-11 commission and it's time somebody called them on it.Of course Ann's been vilified and she's brave enough to take it. I especially enjoyed how Ann refused to back down from gentle prodding from Matt Lauer to Laura Ingraham to back off of her claim that the likes of Karen Brentweiser are harpies and enjoying their time in the spotlight. A spotlight they would not have save that their husbands died during the 9-11 attack. At my last count almost 3,000 husbands, wives, sons and daughters died during that attack, yet only four think they can tell us that our lawfully elected President was responsible for the attacks and still has not made us safe. A lie wethinks. There have been exactly ZERO terrorist attacks in this country since 9-11 and this is because of the success by the current administration to thwart them.
The opportunistic young women are peeing upon our feet and telling us its raining. How clever of the Democrats, to recruit such criticism-proof candidates.
Ann's response to Hillary's criticism was supreme. She responded that Hillary should look at her own groping, intern-abusing husband when it comes to mistreating women as Hillary accused Ann of.
Touche, Ann. Her book is now number one on the Amazon bestseller. SOMEBODY's buying these books.
The Jersey girls are, ahem, not happy. They do not want their carefully crafted façade disrupted and besides, Brentweiser is running for some office or another. As a Democrat, of course.
Just What We Need Right Now-New Gun Control Laws
It does not matter how noble the words sound, attempts to control guns are currently NOT the rage.
Americans, God love them, have had quite enough of gun control in that such measures do little to deter the criminal element from obtaining guns and only serve to make crazed bureaucratic victims of law-abiding citizens who just want to protect themselves and their family from those same criminals.
It gets old and God knows Americans are quite aware of strangers in their midst.
Yet New York Mayor Bloomberg, a liberal dressed in Republican clothing if ever there was one, keeps carrying the Moonbats' water.
In New York, of all places.
You get what you elect.
From Spacewar.com:
New York City proposes new gun control laws
The legislative package, which will be presented to the City Council later this month, would require individuals convicted of criminal possession of a weapon to register their current addresses and personally report to the police every six months.
Do any of us doubt that those convicted of criminal gun possession will dutifully report to the police every six months? My,my. Ye of little faith.
Haditha Update
The salivation and eager hand-wringing over the possibility of an Iraqi My Lai took some blows last week, what with the killing of Abu Musab al-Zarqawi and the great Canadian terrorism bust. Goodness, there are terrorists amongst us and the Lamestream's constant attempt to find OUR side the BAD side took a beating.
From Sweetness and Light, we have this quote from the London Guardian regarding Haditha. This article appeared in August of last year, well before that supposed "massacre" by our Marines.
One of these days we're going to get a media that's on our side. What a concept.
Guardian gains rare access to Iraqi town and finds it fully in control of 'mujahideen'
Omer Mahdi in Haditha and Rory Carroll in Baghdad
Monday August 22, 2005
The executions are carried out at dawn on Haqlania bridge, the entrance to Haditha. A small crowd usually turns up to watch even though the killings are filmed and made available on DVD in the market the same afternoon.
One of last week's victims was a young man in a black tracksuit. Like the others he was left on his belly by the blue iron railings at the bridge's southern end. His severed head rested on his back, facing Baghdad. Children cheered when they heard that the next day's spectacle would be a double bill: two decapitations. A man named Watban and his brother had been found guilty of spying.
With so many alleged American agents dying here Haqlania bridge was renamed Agents' bridge. Then a local wag dubbed it Agents' fridge, evoking a mortuary, and that name has stuck.
A three-day visit by a reporter working for the Guardian last week established what neither the Iraqi government nor the US military has admitted: Haditha, a farming town of 90,000 people by the Euphrates river, is an insurgent citadel.
Dogs For Lunch Buddies
I'll go out on a limb here and suggest that many American households regularly have dogs in the surround during meal times. Okay, so maybe a lot of them don't allow the dogs to actually lick the human plates as occurs in my household but hey, I'm betting a lot of them do.
So Florida now allows dogs to join the humans at outdoor eating establishments. Well why not? If the dog misbehaves there will be repercussions. We don't need the government to legislate our human sensibilities.
Soon enough dogs might be allowed to join us indoors for lunch or dinner. Those who shun such a thought can simply not frequent the establishment.
Our pet dogs sleep with us, eat with us, bathe with us, hey government, we can handle it.
From CNN.com:
New law lets dogs chow down in restaurants
ORLANDO, Florida (AP) Gov. Jeb Bush on Friday signed the so-called "doggie dining" bill, which allows local governments to let restaurants permit dogs to eat with their owners outside.
We're Still Waiting for the McKinney Grand Jury
Requests for the status of the Cynthia McKinney grand jury are met with silence by legal poohbahs.
The woman smacked a Capitol Police officer with a cell phone and any one of us would be under indictment, perhaps in the slammer, for the same offense.
No. Wait. The Capitol Police are the ones who drove Patrick Kennedy home after his drunken accident with a road barrier.
There's rules for congress critters and then there's rules for us peons.
TV's For Starving Palestinians
We don't begrudge televisions for the poor people of Palestine even though they recently elected a terrorist organization for their government. We do begrudge that "country" the right to boo-hoo all over the place because of the international community's refusal to support their elected terrorists.
From Israelnn.com:
While the Hamas/Palestinian Authority continues to claim hunger and impoverishment because of the world's financial boycott, 111 truckloads of TV sets have entered Gaza over the past two weeks.
The televisions, imported by Israelis and resold to PA importers for sale to end users, were shipped through the Karni Crossing. The upswing in television purchases in the PA may be related to the start of the World Cup soccer games in Europe, broadcast throughout the Middle East. The price in Israel to watch the World Cup is some 300 shekels.
Lt.-Col. Shlomo Dror, speaking with Arutz-7's correspondent Haggai Huberman, confirmed the report, and said that 400 trucks enter every day with food and medicines.
From the "No Longer With Us" Department
Abu Musab al-Zarqawi. May he rest in peace. NOT!
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