Wednesday

Fish Giggles: Classes for Men AND Women.. only not the same

Everyone Needs a Laugh; Giggles that crossed Grandmother's path and worthy of note

Classes For Women

…Grandmother thinks some of these course make as much sense as our liberal educational system’s current offerings. Below this, of course, classes for men.

Women think they already know everything, but wait...

training courses are now available for women on the following subjects:


1. Silence, the final frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before

2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits

3. Combating the Imelda Marcos Syndrome: You Don't Need New Shoes Everyday

3a. Classic Footwear: Wearing Shoes You Already Have. May be taken in
conjunction with #3.

4. Parties: Going without a New Outfit

5. Man Management: Discover How Minor Household Chores Can Wait Until
After the Game

6. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet, Too

7. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is His

8. Valuation: Just Because it's Not Important to You....

9. Communication Skills I: Tears --- The Last Resort, Not the First

10. Communication Skills II: Thinking Before Speaking

11. Communication Skills III: Getting What You Want, without Nagging

12. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill you CAN Acquire

13. Party Etiquette: Drinking your Fair Share

14. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up

15. Introduction to Parking

16. Advanced Parking: Reversing into a Space

17. Overcoming Anal Retentive Behavior: Leaving the Towels on the Floor

18. Water retention: Fact or Fat

19. Cooking I: Bring Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter

20. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not For Human Consumption

21. Cooking III: How not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People

22. Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have

23. Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice

24. Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together

25. Oil and Gas: Your Car Needs Both

26. "Do These Jeans Make My Butt Look Big?":
Why Men Lie

27. TV Remote: For Men Only

28. Sex: It's for Married Couples, Too

29. Ballet: For Women Only

30. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully

31. PMS: Your Problem . . . Not His

32. Dancing: Why Men Don't Like To
=============================================



Classes for Men

COURSE OFFERINGS FOR MALES:

1. You too, can do housework.

2. PMS: Learning to keep your mouth shut.

3. Combating stupidity.

4. How to fill an ice tray.

5. We do not want small electrical appliances for Christmas. Give us $$$
and lace.

6. Understanding the female response to your coming in drunk at 4:00 AM.

7. Wonderful laundry techniques (formerly called "Sorting 1A: Don't wash
my silks").

8. Parenting (No, it doesn't end with conception.).

9. Get a life; learn to cook.

10. How not to act like a jerk when you're obviously wrong.

11. Spelling: Even you can get it right.

12. Understanding your financial incompetence.

13. You, the weaker sex.

14. Reasons to give flowers.

15. How to stay awake after sex.

16. You CAN fall asleep without it if you really try.

17. Garbage: Getting it to the curb.

18. The weekend and sports are not synonymous.

19. How to put the toilet seat down.

20. How to go shopping with your mate and not get lost.

21. The remote control: overcoming your dependency.

22. Helpful posture hints for the couch potato.

23. How not to act younger than your children.

24. You, too, can be a designated driver.

25. Honest, you don't look like Mel Gibson, especially when naked.

26. Changing your underwear; it really works.

27. The attainable goal: eliminating %$#@! from your vocabulary.

28. Fluffing the blankets after farting is not necessary.

29. Real men ask for directions.

30. How to park without circling the parking lot more than once.

31. How to place a new roll of toilet paper in the dispenser.

32. Romance after marriage.

33. Accuracy in Aiming 101.

34. Why it is unacceptable to relieve yourself anywhere but in the bathroom.

35. Morning Dilemma - if IT is awake, take a shower.

36. Clint Eastwood and Charles Bronson are not fine actors.

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