Politics and TV Antennas
A farmer finally decided to buy a televion set. The store assured him that they would install the antenna and TV the next day. The next evening the farmer turned on his new TV and found only political ads on every channel. The next morning he turned the TV on and found only political ads again. When he came in to eat lunch he tried the TV again but still only found political ads. The next day when he still found only political ads he called the store to complain. The owner said that it was impossible for every channel to only have political ads, but agreed to send their repairman to check the TV. When the TV repairman turned on the TV he found that the farmer was right. After looking at the TV for a while he went outside to check the antenna. In a few minutes he returned and told the farmer he had found the problem. The antenna had been installed on top of the windmill and grounded to the manure spreader. |
Golf vs. Sex
A golfer is in a competitive match with a friend, who is ahead by a couple of strokes. "Boy, I'd give anything to sink this putt," the golfer mumbles to himself. Just then, a stranger walks up beside him and whispers, "Would you be willing to give up one-fourth of your sex life?" Thinking the man is crazy and his answer will be meaningless, the golfer also feels that maybe this is a good omen so he says, "Sure," and sinks the putt. Two holes later, he mumbles to himself again, "Gee, I sure would like to get an eagle on this one." The same stranger is at his side again and whispers, "Would it be worth giving up another fourth of your sex life?" Shrugging, the golfer replies, "Okay." And he makes an eagle.  On the final hole, the golfer needs another eagle to win. Without waiting for him to say anything, the stranger quickly moves to his side and says, "Would winning this match be worth giving up the rest of your sex life?" "Definitely," the golfer replies, and he makes the eagle. As the golfer is walking to the club house, the stranger walks alongside him and says, "I haven't really been fair with you because you don't know who I am. I'm the devil, and from this day forward you will have no sex life." "Nice to meet you," the golfer replies, "I'm Father O'Malley." |
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More Fish Giggles HERE
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The LAST Picture I Ever Took
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More pics of week HERE
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TV Review: Skating With Celebrities-Four Left
Earlier reviews on the show were published on 1/22/06, and the most recent on
1/29/06.
Let us begin with the team eliminated on 1/30/06, Kurt Browning & Deborah Gibson. This team's combined scores for their routine was 47.9. With the other competitors bringing in scores ranging from 49.1 to 50.1, that score was not enough to make the cut. The professional skater, Kurt Browning, lamented during the pre-routine vignette that he was small and couldn't carry his partner around as easily as the other fellows. Although I thought he did a pretty good job as he lifted, spun and skated with Gibson in his arms. It wasn't good enough, however. Now there are four teams left:The contenders remaining:
The big surprise on this night of the competition was the lead taken over by Bruce Jenner and Tai Babilonia. Before, Jillian Barberie and John Zimmerman handily took the lead on each prior episode. On the show featured 1/30/06, Jenner's combined score was 50.1 while Barberie's was 49.8.
In fact, the other combined scores are very close as well. Coulier and Kerrigan came in at 49.7, while Swanson and Eisler scored a 49.1. So there's roughly one point range between all the remaining contenders.
I'm kind of partial to Bruce Jenner, poor fellow with bad knees and hey, he's 55 years old. Same age as me and I can't imagine learning to ice skate at my age. But Jillian has what seems to be an inborn grace and talent that she brings to the competition. She's going to be hard to beat.
It's the team of Nancy Kerrigan and Dave Coulier that could be a dark horse here. Though that might be my own wishful thinking in that Nancy Kerrigan is so well known and it seems only right this team would be right in the middle of things.Did some research on Dave Coulier as he had been unknown to me. Turns out he has quite a resume. From Fox's site for the competition:
Dave Coulier is perhaps best known for his work on the long-running television series "Full House." After airing for eight seasons, the show is currently in worldwide syndication in over 100 countries, and airs domestically every day on multiple cable networks. Coulier followed this success by hosting the series "America's Funniest People," "The World's Funniest Videos" and his own cable series, "Out of Control."
Coulier also hosted the multiple-award winning-cable television series "Animal Kidding," and appeared on VH1's No.1-rated series "The Surreal Life." One of the most trusted personalities in family programming, he is hosting his second season of "America's Most Talented Kids" for the i Network. He also stars as the voices of "Felix the Cat," "the Professor" and "Rock Bottom" in several upcoming "Felix the Cat" animated feature films for video release.
Coulier can also be seen hosting "I Can't Believe I Wore That" for WE and "My RV Life" for the Travel Channel.
The routine performed by Coulier and Kerrigan was quite amusing. Dave was the girl and Nancy was the guy, complete with hilarious costumes. Although Coulier is not the professional skater of this team, he did pick up Kerrigan and carry her around the ice handily.
The team of Kristy Swanson & Lloyd Eisler also skated well that evening, with moves including a smashing segment that had Swanson laying parallel and close to the ice as her partner held her hand and skated around the rink.
The new move required for that evening was something called "the lunge". Swanson stumbled briefly during her routine but recovered nicely enough to remain in the competition.
I predict that Swanson and Eisler will be the next team eliminated.
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