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HAD ENOUGH YET?
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Here's a story told with trains. TRAINS
The Bureau of Meteorology forecasts rainstorms so the bride can expect a few good inches overnight.
Love is a thousand miles long but comes in six inch installments.
"The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it."
Confucius say man who sink into woman's arms soon have arms in woman's sink.
Sorry I cannot be at Wedding... Please send me a photo of Bride and Groom Mounted.
Easy on the throttle, steady on the gears, roll her over gently and She'll last for many years.
Don't keep him in the dog house too often or he might give his bone to the woman next door.
Treat him like a flower... grab him by the stalk.
If you don't want the Stork to come, Shoot in the air.
Go for it mate. We all did!
All the best from Mr. and Mrs. Farkin and all the Farkin kids.
She offered her honour, He honoured her offer, and all night he was on her and off her.
Don't Spring on the Inner-Spring this Spring or there will be an Off-Spring next Spring.
Hope your honeymoon is like a train ride through the Khyber Pass, One long hard route.
Please remember that Brandy makes you Randy, Whisky makes you Frisky, but its a good stiff Johnny Walker that makes you Pregnant.
Travel Agency to Bride:
The grooms face leaves at midnight. Be on it.
Congratulations on the termination of your isolation and may I express an appreciation of your determination to end the desperation and frustration which has caused you so much consternation in giving you the inspiration to make a combination to bring an accumulation to the population.
Football coach to bride:
If you've tried him in 18 positions and he's still no good, pull him off.
Treat the Bride like a new car, go easy for the first 500.
You ever notice how few Americans go out marching against foreign visitors? I mean when we get that Japanese Elvis freak or some Arab Poohbah visiting our country, Americans don't go out protesting and acting like unfriendly idiots. I do recall that Chinese guy and the woman who got in via the press pool to protest China's treatment of certain religious groups. But this was an exception.
Yet let our President, and it isn't just Bush, go to another country and there's always some big group or another protesting. Which makes me think that someone recruited these people to get out and help make a sight bite for the world to see on the evening news.
So Bush is in Germany and a whole bunch of know-nothings in some small two-bit town go out marching in protest. In protest of what? That America has to constantly save the world's sorry behind? Heh. Germany. Well they've got one fine and proud history to be marching against the United States.
Below, Bush picks up a baby and, as babies are wont to do, the baby cries. Which allows the mean-spirited London Dailymail to quip some nonsense about the baby not being the only one mad at Bush.
So impossibly clever, this drive-by media. Heh.
From The Daily Mail U.K.
And the baby, whose parents are German, was not the only one unhappy with Mr Bush's presence in the village of Trinwillershagen, in the former East Germany.
Around 5,000 protesters did their best to interrupt the outdoor meeting and meal between the president and Germany's chancellor Angela Merkel. Eventually shielded from the noise by 40 tons of barbed wire and 12,000 policemen, the pair sat down to dine on a roasted wild boar slaughtered earlier that day, uninterrupted by protesters. Or babies.
Seems that President Bush, while attending that joke of a G8 summit, actually got caught on sound telling the truth.
Ooops, he did say a barnyard word, SHIT, to be specific. Can't have that.
John Effen Kerry said the "F" word every day during the presidential campaign the man was so damn cool. But Bush, well he's the devil returned.
The blow-dried pundits certainly had a field day all sitting around mahogany tables and discussing it with gravitas. Meanwhile the rest of America, those of us who haul the shit everyday and carry this country on our backs, loved it.
From The Guardian:
President Bush, not realizing his remarks were being picked up by a microphone at a summit of world leaders, bluntly expressed his frustration with Hezbollah's actions.
``See, the irony is what they really need to do is to get Syria to get Hezbollah to stop doing this (expletive),'' Bush told Blair in a discussion before the Group of Eight leaders began their lunch.
Bush's remarks were picked up by the summit's closed-circuit television, which was filming the leaders sitting down to eat.
Those Hilarious Democrats
The current Mideast crisis is, of course, Bush's fault. Because before Dubya, the entire planet was a peaceful oasis of serenity. Arafat eagerly accepted Israel's offer of half of its country and terrorist groups were unheard of in the Sudan. Enron and other boom companies chugged happily along and life was good.
It's not like Hezbollah occupied southern Lebanon way back when Carter was President and for sure they didn't kill over 240 of our marines with no American response.
But hey, time for the butt monkeys to come out of their cages and start cleaning the Clintons' image. It's for Hillary you know.
Below a quote from the Washington Times casting a dubious eye on the Democratic party's assertion that if THEY were in power, things would be different.
Some Democrats regard what's happening between Israel and Hezbollah as an opportunity to scrub up the party's bona fides on foreign policy. This means trying to invoke a mythical Clinton legacy and blaming everything bad on President Bush.
From the same link as above, we have Howard Dean, heh, telling us just how the Dems would handle it. Which begs the question as to why the hell they didn't handle it when they had a chance?
"we would have worked day after day after day to make sure we didn't get where we are today"
She's Getting Ready
And for a mere $4,200, you too can be a guest of Hillary's at her spiffed up new mansion.
For almost a million bucks you'll be treated to the ambience of extensive outdoor lighting and a brand new swimming pool. All in this over seven thousand foot abode and drinks are on the house.
Scuttlebutt has it that these renovations are all in preparation for the many fundraisers to raise money for Hillary because, as we all should know, we NEED this woman to lead us.
WASHINGTON -- As if celebrity name recognition and superstar political status weren't enough, Sen. Hillary Clinton has added another tool to her mega-fund-raising arsenal: her newly renovated Washington mansion.
In work that ended last month according to District of Columbia building records, Clinton, D-N.Y., spent well over $800,000 expanding and updating her Embassy Row manse, adding a new pool house and a giant ballroom-like addition for entertaining.
There really is a book called "Manliness". It's written by Harvey Mansfield and is published by the Yale University Press. The book has become a bit of a below-the-radar cult hit in that the main contention of the book is that our culture is losing manliness at such a high rate that the salvation of the planet might be lost along with the missing manliness.
For a bunch of women, yon ladies and gems, are NOT going to go over to Lebanon and fight a war.
Of course I posted my own little rant on manliness, HERE, when, with tongue in cheek I suggested that any man needing Viagra was no manly man. Sarcasm aside, there's a world of truth in Mansfield's book and I type with the insight of a former and rabid woman's libber. In my elder and more gentle years I finally see the trees for the forest.
Below a link to a review of Mansfield's book.
From The Spectator.org:
"...Forgotten manliness: the nameless English soldier who fashioned a cross for Joan of Arc from the wood of her pyre."
In India and China they are messing around so much with pre-birth gender selection that there is now almost a crisis in terms of the distribution of the sexes.
Covered here on this Blog, it seems the practice of "preselective abortion", ie selectively eliminating children of an unwanted sex, is altering the normal landscape of humanity in countries encouraging this sort of thing.
While I am a champion of the manly man, it will not do to have entire countries filled with just men and a paucity of females. The planet needs females too, let us not forget.
Thus I came across this article about an arranged marriage that went awry because the bride was "too ugly". Whatever that means.
Look for more of this in the future because while nature seems to insure a distribution of the sexes on a roughly 50-50 percentage, once man gets his ugly hands into it everything goes kerplooey.
From the Boston Herald.com:
A Massachusetts man whose family traveled all the way to India to check out a possible bride for his son is suing the woman's relatives because she was too ugly and unpolished for his baby boy.
In his lawsuit, Dr. Vijai Pandey of Belchertown claims his wife, son and daughter were "shocked" to discover the Indian woman was "ugly with dark complexion and protruded bad teeth and couldn't speak English to carry on conversation."
Pandey then called off the arranged marriage, according to the lawsuit posted on the Web site thesmokinggun.com
Life After Castro
I'd recently read a blurb by Castro's physician regarding his infamous charge. Seems the man is healthy and could live another twenty years.
It's always seemed to me that America's position on Cuba, other than boycotting its cigars, has been to wait until Fidel dies. Now I discover that the lovely Fidel has other ideas. Seems he has a brother and all plans are in place to turn the reigns of power over to him. Keeping it in the family and all that.
The left would have us believe that Castro's Cuba is a wonderful world of free health care from birth to death and a paradise unfettered. Which makes me ask, silly me, why on earth are all the Cubans dying, literally, to get to the United States if Cuba's so great?
But Castro, who apparently enjoys good health and turns 80 on Aug. 13, has been fortifying the ruling Communist Party to ensure the status quo long after his death. He plans to hand over power to his 75-year-old brother Raul, the first vice president of Cuba's Council of State.
Renewed Respect for Dan Quayle
Poor Dan Quayle. Here's the beleaguered VP running mate of George Bush the First and one of the victims of The Old Media of the era. Back when people actually believed the Old Media instead of smirking.
They painted Quayle as some sort of dunderhead and the pundits were all atwitter over Quayles misspelling of the word "potato".
Seems that Quayle recently attended a concert of John Mellencamp, a singer I USED to like by the way, but he walked out when Mr. Mellencamp, political and foreign policy expert, dedicated a song to all the people President Bush allegedly hurt.
We really love Quayle's response to queries about his walking out in the middle of the Mellencamp concert:
Quayle said through a publicist: ``Well, I think Mellencamp's performance was not very good to begin with, and the comment put it over the top.''
I now think Quayle is waaaaaay smart.
Why can't they just sing?
Dan Quayle took time out from participating in the American Century Celebrity Golf Championship in Stateline, Nev., on Friday to attend John Mellencamp's concert only to run into a political statement.
He then made a statement of his own by walking out during Mellencamp's rendition of ``Walk Tall.'' Before launching into the song, Mellencamp told the Harveys casino crowd, in effect, that it was dedicated to everyone hurt by policies of the current Bush administration.
Quayle, who served as vice president for President Bush's father in 1989-93 walked out of the venue before Mellencamp finished the song.
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