Thought-How the Republicans Can End This Torture Nonsense; Dancing With Stars, Hell's Kitchen, American Idol and Celebrity Apprentice Updates;MORE

The INDOOR plants are now in their glory in the gardens of Serendipity Shore.

The brown thrashers have another nest in the hedge roses. But what's with these "doors" the bird fellows keep creating in the shrubbery? And does the robin really know when the dog is leashed?
==============
It's down to two on American Idol 2009. One is the beloved of the teenyboppers and one has talent and more talent.

Can the force of the 12-14 year olds really create a talent injustice that will forever cast a pall upon the very soul of American Idol?

All with pics and video you'll find nowhere else on the Internet.
================
There's little doubt who's going to win this year's Dancing With the Stars, 2009, competition.

For Gilles Marini is sexy, handsome and a damn good dancer.

So who will be second, Melissa or Shawn?

Some wry observations on this year's contest including a sarcastic little jibe at Melissa and her cute tiny lie.

All with pics and video you'll find nowhere else on the Internet.
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Celebrity Apprentice and Hell's Kitchen 2009 are over now. We've got some memories with pics and video from throughout the contest.

Along with my own fine rants about why the winner of each is not believable and how this will adversely affect future contests.

Plus a review of BravoTV's newest reality show that leaves me giggling through the night. Not at the basis of the contest but at the contenders!
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The sorry saga of Miss California should have taught us all about our future and those of us who dare to express our true hearts that would offend the very mean.

If only the Republicans would take the torture bull by the horns that entire joke would soon be past tense and the Dems would fall like dominos against the weight of a wrecking ball.

The Nice Guy of this Past Week, the Bad Guy of the Past Week in this week's Thoughts.

It all ends with a smile.

Pic of the Day







Carrie Prejean-Miss California

This Blogger puts yon reader on “aware” status because in the ongoing, very mean saga of Miss California’s torment for daring to say that she believes marriage is between a man and a woman, we learn that Obama spinner, David Axelrod, quips that one of the names in consideration for the new Obama dog is “Miss California”.

Snark, snark, snark, yukkity yuk.

All the poor girl said was that she thinks marriage should be between a man and a woman, something almost some 80% of the country believes as well. For this she gets called a “bitch” by the very, very fine Perez Hilton, expert assessor of human personality and such a fair man his very excrement does not stink.

And while my own rants are fine affairs, I offer, Ann Coulter’s Fine Rant as one of the best out there.

For this Blogger, we name Carrie Prejean as the Good Guy of the Week. I heard her fine speech after the Donald Trump obligatory public relations grab of the week and she did a fine job expressing her love of country and how she endured the constant drum of mean-ness via her faith and the support of her friends and family.



I must say that any kind regard the heterosexuals, who comprise like 95% of the country, might have had for our homosexual brethran all got thrown under the train with Perez Hilton’s nastiness.

Methinks the homosexuals need a good PR guy.

Now we have this Obama administration and hey, they’re going to name the dog Miss California and they too could use some help in the department of fairness and good reputation.

I’m just sayin’.



Nancy Pelosi…How Many Ways Can This Woman Lie

We give the current Speaker, oops, Liar of the House this weeks Bad Guy of the Week award because come on folks, raise your hands anyone who believes this woman knew nothing, NOTHING, about waterboarding some of our nastier enemies after several CIA briefings.



Sure we all know politicians lie but goodness even Bill Clinton made some attempt to ACT like he wasn’t lying. All Nancy Pelosi did this past week was offer a new set of talking points that contradicted the old talking points and that whole pathetic group of folks in Pelosi’s office just gave it up and offered up prayers that the earth would just boil over from the long-promised climate change that the constant questions would cease.

Heh.

Pay no attention to those calls for Pelosi to resign as Speaker of the House. That ain’t gonna happen.

Although I have a suggestion that would not only cause Pelosi to quit, it would also bring to an end this nonsense about alleged “torture” and would shine a light bright and strong on the hypocrisy of the Democratic party.

Gonads required and this is why it probably won’t come to pass.



Who else but Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi wins this week’s QUIPS of the WEEK with her various versions of what she knew about waterboarding and when she knew it?

First, she knew nothing at all, there had been no briefings by the CIA, like Hogan’s Heros Sgt. Schultz, she knew nothing.

When it was revealed that Pelosi did, indeed, attend a briefing by the CIA in 9/2002, well then Pelosi said she was there but the CIA said nothing about waterboarding.

When it was revealed that the CIA revealed the practice of waterboarding at that 9/2002 briefing Pelosi said she didn’t protest because she didn’t want to disrupt the flow of the system, whatever the hell that meant. She continued to allege that waterboarding was never mentioned.

Of course on one such lie Pelosi resorted to what had always been tried and true…the ole blame George Dubya Bush excuse. Seems Dubya had memory removers surreptitiously placed in Pelosi’s head so that she would not remember discussions of waterboarding.

Then we move on to the hell with it, Pelosi said the CIA just flat out lied to congress, yes they did, they LIED to us all.

When the CIA head fights back against such a horrific allegation Pelosi came back with yet another George Dubya Bush fingerpoint but folks, at this point…who the hell would believe this woman if she said it was raining even as we are getting soaked from the downpour?

How the Republicans Can Get Pelosi Removed, Eliminate All the Fake Uproar About “Torture”, Expose the Democrats as the Lying Hypocrites and Maybe Take Over to Congress to Boot.

Yes it sounds like a tall order but I argue it would be simple matter.

First, REPUBLICANS…get out of the tanning booths! Stop hobnobbing with “friends across the aisle”, risk the disruption of head hairs from their appointed places and adjust gonads, if found, to a more comfortable position within the underwear.

Second, remember Tom Foley? He was a poor Florida congressman who was caught sending naughty email to a White House Page who was of legal age. Recall the media firestorm that brought this poor man down and huddle to scheme a media firestorm of like proportions to demand a hearing on “torture”.

Third, call constant press conferences, send op-eds to the WSJ, in short consult the Democratic playbook on how to make a big damn deal over nothing…check in especially with Harry Reid who calls a press conference to announce the status of his corns.

The Democrats do not wish any sort of lengthy hearing on “torture” that would receive the harsh glare of publicity light to cause Americans to scratch their heads in confusion.

For the American public ain’t gonna buy that the playing of constant Barry Manilow tunes or slamming into walls that MUST be padded, or the waterboarding of only THREE very dangerous terrorists that DID reveal attack information that was stopped in its tracks…hey, the American public ain’t gonna buy that this is torture and needs to be stopped.

Further, we all know that Nancy Pelosi, indeed the entire Democratic party okayed these “torture” techniques, even the playing of Barry Manilow tunes for eight straight hours- surely America at its worse. If the Republicans had gonads they’d be beating the drums to please, oh please, oh please…let’s have hearings.

Let the Democrats show the world how they want to throw Bush and Cheney in jail for God’s sake for successfully defending this country for eight years no matter how much you dislike these fellows. Americans ain’t gonna like this, no they’re not.

Besides the meterosexuals at the NY Times, the only ones who care that we “tortured” terrorists considered in possession of knowledge of future attacks on this country, the only others who care about this topic are the sons of camels in the Arab world. As they vacation in the Riviera, the Arabs want pictures and memos of mistreatment of the captured terrorists to be widely publicized that they can appropriately pay their subjects and cause a rampage on the vaunted “arab street” against Americans who so torture their Muslim terrorist brothers.

America will then be incriminated into backing down, maybe even apologizing for protecting itself, especially for those Barry Manilow tunes.

Heh.

I throw down the gauntlet and dare the Republicans to grow a pair. Go on! Scare the hell out of the Democrats and insist, INSIST, on hearings on torture.

If the pubs ever want to throw out the Dems…well here’s one quick way to do it.



I copy my rant on the final outsome of this year’s “Celebrity Apprentice” for the rant of the week. It is also featured in my TV post HERE

The Donald Pushes Our Suspension of Disbelief Too Far in Celebrity Apprentice 2009

The Celebrity Apprentice 2009 is a done deal as of this writing. Joan Rivers won but she certainly did not deserve it. And I know Donald Trump knows it because in the real world The Donald would never have chosen Joan over Annie Duke, I am sure of this.

First, some old pic montages and a video for nostalgia below.







Below a video of Joan doing her stuff.



If ever a show was staged it is Celebrity Apprentice but there’s nothing wrong with this. Donald Trump took his old reality show formula of having folks do business types of challenges and combined it with the Dancing With the Stars Concept by having celebrities do the challenges with monies won going to the celebs’ favorite charities.

Frankly I like the original The Apprentice series but that concept sputtered and turned belly up once Martha Stewart somehow got involved with it all.

So okay, it’s an idea that kind of works. Ordinary Americans tune in by the millions to witness “stars” looking for a career boost try to dance their way into America’s heart and on to better jobs in the public eye. Thus why couldn’t the concept be transferred to the old Celebrity concept, or so I ask?

Celebrity Apprentice has the same sort of “celebrities” on its show as on “Dancing With the Stars” ie, entertainers that have faded or haven’t had a gig in a while, sports stars looking for a way to make a living post playing field, oddball famous business types.

On the 2009 Celebrity Apprentice, Joan Rivers was about the most famous of the contenders.

A complete list of this year’s celebrities included:

-Jesse James-founder of West Coast Choppers
-Dennis Rodman-5 time NBA champion
-Andrew "Dice" Clay-once dirty mouthed comedian
-Joan Rivers-talk show host
-Herschel Walker-Retired NFL player
-Khloe Kardashian-the Kardashian without the nice ass
-Tionne "T-Box" Watkins-R&B singer
-Natalie Gulbis-Professional golfer
-Tom Green-Actor, comedian
-Claudia Jordan-Actress, model
-Clint black-country music star
-Brande Roderick-Actress and Playboy model
-Brian McKnight mutli platinum R&B singer
-Melissa Rivers-daughter of Joan Rivers
-Scott Hamilton-gold medal olympic figure skater
-Annie Duke-professional poker player, motivational speaker

We understand that reality shows need a conflict. We even understand that the conflict between Joan and Clint Black died quickly as Black was the most harmless guy on the planet and wore the winsome smile of Jesus himself. Thus the new conflict between Joan and Annie Duke was a little more believable than the Rivers/Black conflict but not much.

Annie Duke came off as a very nice lady. The scripted conflict between Rivers had Joan calling her Hitler and calling poker players the scum of the earth. To spice things up, we had Joan’s daughter Melissa as part of the conflict but it only made Melissa look like a bratty and totally unlikeable person.

Still we suffered the difficult to believe conflict but the real damage came when Joan Rivers won the entire thing.

First, Annie Duke raised almost half a million on the last task while Joan raised a little over a hundred grand.

But oh there were other factors involved besides amount of money raised, or so The Donald tells us with a straight face.

Go with me here, folks, in the real world, The Donald would have how much money earned as being the ONLY criteria that mattered as niceness and sincerity and glibness matter not when the bucks are rolling in.

Donald Trump WANTED to have Joan Rivers win this year’s contest is all and he didn’t fool me at all.

Annie Duke consistently presented herself well, she showed fine leadership, she was personable, she regularly won tasks, she was liked by her colleagues except Melissa and Joan and that was a manufactured hatred.

I say to Donald Trump, hey, it’s okay. We don’t believe that Joan Rivers won that thing but she’s waaaaay more famous than Annie Duke and everyone knows that celebrity is what it’s all about with The Donald.

The conundrum is, Trump better not pull the same stunt again. For as Martha Stewart just wasn’t believable in her version of The Apprentice, neither is awarded “championships” based on how famous the contender is.

Donald Trump needs to know that the American public can only suspend their disbelief so much.
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Ending With a Smile-Words of Wisdom

Some you may have heard before. Some might be new. All bring a smile.

I planted some bird seed. A bird came up.
Now I don't know what to feed it.
*****
I had amnesia once --
or twice.
*****
I went to San Francisco . I found someone's heart.
Now what?
*****
Protons have mass?
I didn't even know they were Catholic.
*****
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
*****
If the world were a logical place, men would be the ones who ride horses sidesaddle.
*****
What is a "free" gift?
Aren't all gifts free?
*****
They told me I was gullible
and I believed them.
*****
Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home,
and when he grows up, he'll never be able to merge his car onto the
freeway.
******
Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone
*****
One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people.
*****
My weight is perfect for my height --
which varies
*****
I used to be indecisive.
Now I'm not sure.
*****
The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
*****
How can there be self-help "groups"?
*****
If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
*****
Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants off.
*****
Is it me--or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?
==============
 


Creating “Doors” in the Shrubbery

I am delighted that the Brown Thrashers have again chosen my hedge roses for their nest placement, as they did last year, Blog post about this HERE.

I do, however, take great exception to the “doors” the thrashers, and other birds, keep creating in my shrubbery. The birds however, do not care what I think.

What happens, the birds fly in and out of the shrubbery, in one case my azaleas and in the case of the thrashers, the hedge roses, so much that the bushes simply, boom, do not grow where the birds keep flying.

My azaleas evidently provide fine protection in the winter. The azaleas are next to my front porch and I often hear birds from within the shrubs and/or see them flying in and out. This year I noted a huge “hole” in the front of the azaleas and I must smile ruefully. The azaleas do have foliage year round and in the winter this is of value to the visiting white-throated sparrows and dark-eyed juncos. I am proud that the bird fellows so enjoy my plantings but sheesh.

Same thing with the hedge roses and the thrashers. These guys have a front door and a back door in my hedge roses.

In both cases the shrubbery doesn’t seem to mind at all. The azaleas simply grow bushier in other parts of the bush and the hedge roses, goodness they are now as tall as a small building. The hedge roses use the energy they’d use for the foliage around those “doors” the thrashers have created to just, boom, grow taller.

Heh.

One more item about the bird fellows in my surround. Do not tell me, as bizarre as it might sound, that the robin nesting in my yard somewhere doesn’t know exactly when I leash the dog during the morning exercise routine.

For the worms are indeed fat and juicy in that bare-grassed area that I use for the morning jog and fast-walk along with the leashed dog. Robins love short-mown lawns as well as bare ground for the ease provided in finding the worms.

Except dog does not allow any other living thing in the backyard beyond her own fine self, which includes squirrel-rodents, of course, and any birds that dare land on HER soil.

So when the dog is allowed to run the yard unfettered for that period when I jog and otherwise exercise without bother of tethered dog, the robin does NOT, pointedly, land in the yard. Should Mr. Robin choose to do so the dog in her freedom will chase it away.

Let me attach the leash to the dog for my final exercise stage of the morning routine, boom, there lands the robin who may then avail himself of the worms without bother of dog.

Don’t tell me that robin doesn’t know that the dog is now on leash and that he may now enjoy the worms he could not get to for the presence of the testy and protective dog that worm-hunting robins do not attack her owner’s person.

The robin all contentedly pulling worms causes the now-leashed dog to tug and pull that dog may be free to chase away the pesky robin one more time. I must then curse the gods of worms that this bird is smart enough to know just when to land and pluck the worms at his leisure as the dog causes me so much grief.



As for the gardens this mid-spring 2009, the indoor plants are now outside for the summer and early fall season. I took a picture of the plants and ponder that soon, very soon, they will have to go as they are getting entirely too big to keep inside the house.


=================
 


Kris or Adam? There’s No Doubt Whatsoever.


America Idol gave up the practice of presenting a big ole show called “America Gives Back” because, frankly, America didn’t give a damn. Oh it’s not that Americans don’t think it’s just great that a very successful show like American Idol goes out into the world and does something good with some of the money they make.

It’s just that America doesn’t really want to sit down and WATCH a paen to charity that is almost depressing for a full hour or longer. In short, nobody was watching “America Gives Back” so American Idol still gives back but doesn’t try to sell it to America as something we should be watching as if a thing of joy and glee.

Now American Idol shows snippets of whatever they did to give money to some charity or other. This past week we had Carrie Underwood going to Africa and delivering mosquito nets to those poor people who suffer so when THEY DON’T HAVE TO SUFFER AT ALL DAMN IT!

African poobahs love to keep their people in misery. Thus the AIDS and MALARIA epidemics in that continent, diseases which have been all but eliminated in the rest of the world. First, the people who live so desperately don’t go revolting against the nasty Poobahs. Second, diseases make America fork up money, much of which goes to the African poobahs.

All Africa has to do to eliminate the malaria problem is…well there’s the mosquito net thing, something we stopped doing in America along with Gone With the Wind…but SPRAY DDT!!

No wait. The United Nations has declared DDT a nasty presticide and banned it throughout the planet. Except go to hell you let the rains fall greatly here in the swamps of Delaware and soon as the sun rises we got planes out spraying DDT everywhere because AMERICANS WON’T PUT UP WITH LIVING LIKE THAT NO MATTER WHAT THE HELL THE UN SAYS.

Anybody that thinks those African poobahs care about the environment please raise your hands.

So anyway Carrie Underwood, former American Idol and now Ambassador of the mosquito nets represented American Idol as America keeps up the façade that malaria isn’t something that could be eradicated within weeks if the UN wasn’t taking bribes from the African poobahs, all to keep those hapless people miserable that the money comes in.



On performance night of 5/12/09, each of the final three singers were assigned a song by a judge as chosen by that judge, and each singer chose a song of his own to, in theory anyway, give a final great performance that will bring each plenty of viewer votes.

Kris Allen has a solid lock on the 10 to 14 year old vote so it didn’t matter much what he sang. For the record, Kris was assigned a song titled “Apologize” by One Republic.

For reasons not entirely clear, the judges got into some kind of fight. Paula said that Kris had a “bum note” in the song but I didn’t hear it. All I heard was boring Kris who could just as easily be Anoop or Matt or Scott. Randy did say that this was the genre that Kris was heading toward, whatever that is.

Hey, Adam’s going to beat Kris but if Kris were to win this thing, the 10-14 year olds would buy his records. Problem is 10-14 years olds grow up and then they want to hear an Adam Lambert.

Kris chose a song titled “Heartless” as his personal song choice and I thought it was one of his better performances. The song was perfect for him and all the 10-14 year olds on the planet.

Danny Gokey didn’t make it through the 5/13/09 elimination round. Paula chose a song for him called “Dance Little Sister”. Judge Kari remarked that Danny was, eh, as a dancer…not so much.

Heh. Well Danny is a white boy and he dances like a white boy.

For his own song choice I’ll give it that Danny chose the best song for him and if “You Are So Beautiful”, a Joe Cocker tune that so suits Danny’s style, didn’t sway the viewers to vote than it was Danny’s time and, indeed, on elimination night, it was Danny’s time.

Simon chose the song “One” by U2 for Adam and I was spellbound throughout Adam’s entire performance. Simon, heh, thought it was a brilliant song choice and, indeed, as Adam is wont to do, he made all the other contenders looks like amateurs.

Adam chose the Aerosmith tune “Crying” as his own song choice. Again, magnificent job. Adam Lambert is an entertainer, born to entertain, raised to entertain, entertainment flows through his veins.

I noted how very gracious Adam was about his competitors. He didn’t come off as full of himself and note now that in terms of personality and interview skills, again, Adam shines.

The finale for this show is shedule on 5/19/09. I think that Adam has this thing locked up. I also think that Adam will not go the route of past Idols that have all but disappeared.

Adam Lambert will be around for many years to come.

Adam Lambert
Alexis Grace-sent home 3/18/09
Allison Iraheta-sent home 4/29/09
Anoop Desai-sent home 4/22/09
Danny Gokey-sent home 5/12/09
Jasmine Murray-sent home 3/11/09
Jorge Nunez-sent home 3/11/09
Kris Allen
Lil Rounds-sent home 4/22/09
Matt Giraud-voted off 4/15/09-saved by judges-sent home again 5/5/09
Megan Joy-sent home 4/1/09
Michael Sarver-sent home 3/28/09
Scott MacIntyre-sent home 4/8/09

Below a remix of the final three and the songs that THEY chose. With mine own fine commentary spliced in.


===================
Shy Ty Sent Home on DWS 2009-Down to Three



Performance night for the final four of Dancing With the Stars 2009 on 5/11 had each of the final four dancers performing twice. One contender and most likely the winner, gave two perfect 30 performances.

As the show nears the end, the families and childhood pics of the finalists were shown that the viewers get an insight to the dancers that the love may grow to a phone in vote.

One contender, the shy but beloved Ty, finally got the boot because…well it was his time.

Melissa danced a Quickstep that had a great ending. Both Bruno and Carrie thought she needed “more”, whatever that means. Melissa got a score of 28 for the performance, with Len giving a fine 10.

Melissa brought up her sad but very scripted, insert wink here, story of being dissed on national TV by Bachelor Jason Mesnick, who originally chose Melissa but changed his mind later.

What’s interesting is that Melissa’s parents would not appear on the Bachelor on the episode where Jason met the parents of his prospective bride. Melissa’s parents were, however, very much in appearance on Dancing With the Stars…heh.

Melissa danced a Cha-Cha for her second dance. I thought she looked very fluid and it was obvious that Melissa is a natural dancer. Melissa got 27 points for the Cha Cha but she deserved better.



Gilles Marini will likely win this thing and he is, indeed, a great dancer. Gilles turned in two perfect dances on this night of the final four. First Gilles danced a waltz and he displayed some wonderful arm movements. Second, Gilles did a Salsa and his body movements were amazing.

Gilles was awarded perfect scores for BOTH dances and I must admit he deserved it. Len wished he had an “11” paddle.



By this point in the competition Ty was just greatly outclassed. No doubt Ty Murray, husband of country singer Jewel and a rodeo star in his own right, has greatly improved. Few who saw Ty’s first few dances on Dancing With the Stars would likely have predicted he’d end up in the top four.

Ty began with a Viennese Waltz and this is not a dance for rodeo stars. Bruno said he looked like he was chasing flies. Heh.

Ty danced a Samba for his second dance and he allegedly messed it up in the middle. One judge said it looked like he tried to be Arthur Murray but instead looked like Murray in a hurry.

Heh.

Ty was eliminated the following night and it was his time.

Finally Shawn took to the floor and it’s between her and Melissa for second place as I see it.

Shawn began with an Argentine Tango and for the first time this year, the judges awarded Shawn a perfect 30 out of 30 for her performance.

It was obvious that Shawn was working hard on that dance and some of the footwork for this dance is kind of scary. One skipped beat or missed cue and someone’s got either bruised shins or very sore testicles.

Shawn came back and danced a Quickstep. Unfortunately Shawn made a mistake right at the beginning. This performance was not near as good as her Tango but she got a respectable 26 points out of 30.



My predictions are that Gilles will win, Melissa will come in second, and Shawn will be a close third.

I kinda wish Melissa could win because, well hey I feel like I know her from covering The Bachelor series for its duration.

Alas, Gilles is definitely the better dancer.

-Ty Murray-Jewel’s husband, rodeo star-sent home 5/12/09
-Holly Madison-on “Girls Next Door”-sent home 3.31.09
-Belinda Carlisle-lead singer Go-Go's-sent home-sent home 3/17/09
-David Alan Grier-Actor-sent home 4/7/09
-Shawn Johnson-17 years old...olympic gold medal winner
-Lil Kim-rapper, singer and actress-sent home 5/5/09
-Gilles Marini-Actor
-Steve-o-MTV Star-sent home 3/21/09
-Melissa Rycroft-Bachelor star
-Denise Richards-Actress-married to a Sheen-sent home-3/24/09
-Lawrence Taylor-NY Giants football Hall of Famer-sent home 4/14/09
-Chuck Wicks-singer and songwriter-sent home 4/28/09
-Steve Wozniak-Apple computer wiz-sent home 3/31/09

A Remix below of two perfect 30 dances. With mine own fine commentary spliced in.


============
The Donald Pushes Our Suspension of Disbelief Too Far in Celebrity Apprentice 2009

The Celebrity Apprentice 2009 is a done deal as of this writing. Joan Rivers won but she certainly did not deserve it. And I know Donald Trump knows it because in the real world The Donald would never have chosen Joan over Annie Duke, I am sure of this.

First, some old pic montages and a video for nostalgia below.







Below a video of Joan doing her stuff.



If ever a show was staged it is Celebrity Apprentice but there’s nothing wrong with this. Donald Trump took his old reality show formula of having folks do business types of challenges and combined it with the Dancing With the Stars Concept by having celebrities do the challenges with monies won going to the celebs’ favorite charities.

Frankly I like the original The Apprentice series but that concept sputtered and turned belly up once Martha Stewart somehow got involved with it all.

So okay, it’s an idea that kind of works. Ordinary Americans tune in by the millions to witness “stars” looking for a career boost try to dance their way into America’s heart and on to better jobs in the public eye. Thus why couldn’t the concept be transferred to the old Celebrity concept, or so I ask?

Celebrity Apprentice has the same sort of “celebrities” on its show as on “Dancing With the Stars” ie, entertainers that have faded or haven’t had a gig in a while, sports stars looking for a way to make a living post playing field, oddball famous business types.

On the 2009 Celebrity Apprentice, Joan Rivers was about the most famous of the contenders.

A complete list of this year’s celebrities included:

-Jesse James-founder of West Coast Choppers
-Dennis Rodman-5 time NBA champion
-Andrew "Dice" Clay-once dirty mouthed comedian
-Joan Rivers-talk show host
-Herschel Walker-Retired NFL player
-Khloe Kardashian-the Kardashian without the nice ass
-Tionne "T-Box" Watkins-R&B singer
-Natalie Gulbis-Professional golfer
-Tom Green-Actor, comedian
-Claudia Jordan-Actress, model
-Clint black-country music star
-Brande Roderick-Actress and Playboy model
-Brian McKnight mutli platinum R&B singer
-Melissa Rivers-daughter of Joan Rivers
-Scott Hamilton-gold medal olympic figure skater
-Annie Duke-professional poker player, motivational speaker

We understand that reality shows need a conflict. We even understand that the conflict between Joan and Clint Black died quickly as Black was the most harmless guy on the planet and wore the winsome smile of Jesus himself. Thus the new conflict between Joan and Annie Duke was a little more believable than the Rivers/Black conflict but not much.

Annie Duke came off as a very nice lady. The scripted conflict between Rivers had Joan calling her Hitler and calling poker players the scum of the earth. To spice things up, we had Joan’s daughter Melissa as part of the conflict but it only made Melissa look like a bratty and totally unlikeable person.

Still we suffered the difficult to believe conflict but the real damage came when Joan Rivers won the entire thing.

First, Annie Duke raised almost half a million on the last task while Joan raised a little over a hundred grand.

But oh there were other factors involved besides amount of money raised, or so The Donald tells us with a straight face.

Go with me here, folks, in the real world, The Donald would have how much money earned as being the ONLY criteria that mattered as niceness and sincerity and glibness matter not when the bucks are rolling in.

Donald Trump WANTED to have Joan Rivers win this year’s contest is all and he didn’t fool me at all.

Annie Duke consistently presented herself well, she showed fine leadership, she was personable, she regularly won tasks, she was liked by her colleagues except Melissa and Joan and that was a manufactured hatred.

I say to Donald Trump, hey, it’s okay. We don’t believe that Joan Rivers won that thing but she’s waaaaay more famous than Annie Duke and everyone knows that celebrity is what it’s all about with The Donald.

The conundrum is, Trump better not pull the same stunt again. For as Martha Stewart just wasn’t believable in her version of The Apprentice, neither is awarded “championships” based on how famous the contender is.

Donald Trump needs to know that the American public can only suspend their disbelief so much.
=================
Danny Takes the Prize in Hell’s Kitchen 2009

Danny is 23 years old and his final challenger, Paula, is 28.

Right there would be reason enough for me to pick Paula over Danny.

So calm down. I know that age shouldn’t be the only factor in who’s the better cook between two people but I’d argue in the tender years of our maturing 20’s, a five year age difference is equivalent to a fifteen year maturity gap in terms of life’s experiences.






There’s also the little factoid that Paula could cook better than Danny. First, Danny’s quasi-restaurant on the final night had a seafood theme, complete with little resin fish festooned on the walls. Yet Danny’s most famous menu item was a great big old filet with a baked potato.

Now there’s nothing wrong with a big ole piece of meat but it was Paula who featured a halibut dish on her menu, this without the colorful fake fish on the wall.

Danny was also roundy criticized on an earlier challenge for his “signature” dish, this critique by food critics no less.

Finally, Danny did tend to display an arrogance often throughout the competition. While I’m all for plentiful self-confidence, Danny overdid it so far as I am concerned.

Paula was more a shade of grey compared to Danny’s bright red. Through every challenge Paula was steady, quiet, hard-working and rarely a victim of Gordon’s wrath.

But Gordon Ramsey chose Danny and now Danny will be the head Chef at Bogata restaurant in Atlantic City.

23 years old. I shake my head ruefully at the notion.
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Bravo TV’s “The Fashion Show”

Heh.

First things first. The link for this new Bravo entry is HERE.

Isaac Mizrahi is the host of this new reality show on BravoTV. Kelly Rowland is Isaac’s co-host. Kelly is a singer from Destiny Child as I understand it. I don’t get her connection to a fashion contest.

So I chanced upon this series one night and I do tend to like fashion and reality shows. A show featuring a contest for fashion designers? I figured …right up my alley.





First, this has got to be the oddest compilation of contenders for a reality show contest in the history of such things.

I understand, speaking softly here, that in such a contest, most, if not all, male contenders would likely be a homosexual brother.

Not that there’s anything wrong with this.

But we’ve got a fellow named Merlin who insists on wearing crazy head gear that makes me giggle. We’ve got another guy named Jonny who wears his hair on his head so that it looks like he’s wearing a huge Chinese dumpling on his scalp. The fellow sent home on the first night of the competition, a Jonny D…well here he is…below.



The premiere show had all of the contenders charged with designing a “must-have” clothing item. All of the contenders were divvied up into three teams. Each team member was then charged with taking the team’s “must-have” clothing object and incorporating it into a specific “look”. The look might include a “night out”, a day at the museum, a work outfit…like that.

Actually this part was quite interesting. Although the alleged “must-haves” the teams chose puzzled me all to hell. They included a pencil skirt, a bolero jacket and harem pants. My own wardrobe does not currently include any of these items, not that I wouldn’t look stupid in any one of them.

Every week an outfit as designed will be chosen and offered online at BravoTV’s web site for this series.

The bolero jacket was kind of cute and the looks designed for the item were mostly quite good. The harem pants, surprisingly, also worked well when included in some happening looks.

The pencil skirt, sheesh, that design team had to be nuts in the way they designed this clothing item. For a pencil skirt could be considered a “must-have” fashion item for a young, happening and hip career woman.

However the team designed that pencil skirt so that it was double-sided, a good idea, but it was also skin-tight, a really, really bad idea. The skinny model had to be cut out of it the thing was so tight.

I watched this show the second week and realized that the show was kind of patterned after BravoTV’s “Top Chef”.

The second week there was a mini-challenge for the would-be designers, along with the elimination challenge.

All I know is I find myself giggling while watching this show. At times I marvel at the clothes designed. There is a talent to designing clothes and if the designers themselves could stop being full of themselves, could keep THEMSELVES out of the arena, this could be an interesting contest to observe.
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