A Cooking Mishap and Pie Surprise
The menu was as follows:
country fried steak
mashed potatoes
fried ham and cheese sandwiches
bacon and french toast
crab cakes
biscuits from tube
crispy chili twists
irish cream cake
choco peanut butter pie
The crab cakes were for me as husband does not eat such as animals with shells.
"You never have to chase a pizza behind the refrigerator," he would sniff on the rare occasions we steamed live crabs at home and hey, sometimes they get loose.
This crab cake was made from crab meat purchased in a can. All properly pasteurized, or so the label hype went. I'm suspicious of pasteurized crab meat as a true Merryland native who thinks they should be pulled from the water, thrown in the pot with a little Old Bay and rock salt, and eaten after a proper steaming turns them bright orange.
Still and so I have eaten my home made crab cakes before, made from the canned crab meat, with wonderful results.
Since it was a fried foods day what with crab cakes and all, I had to pull out the deep fryer, clean it out, refresh the oil and all the froufrou associated with this. And since this is a lot of work, I try to plan multiple fried foods on those cooking Sundays featuring fried entrees.
I do like the deep fryer husband purchased for me one Christmas. It is, however, a bulky and big affair that should be respected with reverence. I don't know what I was expecting when I requested this cooking appliance but it wasn't some huge affair with boiling oil.
In due course I did learn to operate the thing and learned a few things. Such as proper cleaning of the item and precautions to take when using. First, one must have a funnel. It's best to use a throwaway type of affair to drain the oil in as oil, hey it gets everywhere. Using a tupperware container and such leaves a thin layer of oil on the item that item will then too need cleaning. The original container in which the oil came is a good thing to keep around to drain the oil from the fryer. It's not used for other cooking or storing, has a tight cap and is, when one thinks about it, should be big enough to hold all the oil in the fryer. A gallon size or so. I have the original container from when I first bought enough oil to fill the fryer for the first time. Which is why one should have a funnel because the oil is poured into the hole of the empty oil container which is much smaller. Of course the oil can be stored in anything that will hold it but this method works quite well. After pouring the oil back into the fryer after cleaning, the empty container is tightly capped and stored for next time.
After emptying all the oil from the fryer's oil container I spritz all parts with my famous ammonia and water mixture and leave set for a few minutes. Dawn dish detergent, as hyped and it's true, is good for soaking those fryer parts in that can be soaked.
Finally with all oil drained, the fryer cleaned, the oil is returned, the fryer plugged in, and boom, good to go.
The very first thing put into the fryer this Cooking Sunday was a recipe for something called Crispy Chilli Twists. I do like homemade type of snacks and this recipe called for cooked pasta noodles. Cool, I thought.
Here's another tidbit to save grief and clean up when dealing with a deep fryer. Put a generous layer of newspaper under the fryer when it's working, and all work surface within two feet of the fryer. Indeed. There's drips and splatters and nothing works better than newspaper at absorbing the grease with no leakage. After done, wad up the newspaper and toss it in the trash. The counter should be oil free.
This method was NO help when I fried these pasta noodles and right now two things should be noted. First, the recipe calls for the noodles fried in a inch or so of oil in a frying pan. Second, there is a warning in the recipe about thoroughly drying the noodles as water and hot oil, they don't like each other.
Way I figured, I already had the deep fryer out so why bother with that piddly inch of oil in a frying pan?
Which wasn't bad logic and would have worked fine except that bit about the wet noodles.
Now I know all about hot oil and water having been there and done that. I know that cooked pasta tends to be, well, wet. I knew that draining that pasta was critical. Which I did, layering the cooked pasta on paper towels, patting it dry, letting it set for a half hour or so. When I thought the noodles dry enough to fry (they weren't glistening) I put a cup of those puppies in the hot deep fryer, dreaming of homemade well-seasoned snacks to come.
The deep fryer went kerplooey. A volcano of oil boiled up from its bowels and only quick action by The Wise I kept the disaster to a minimum. The pasta looked dry and it felt dry. The hot oil disagreed. God Bless America for that newspaper as it absorbed most of the oil volcano.
Below is a pic of the finished product. I had to sit plates of the pasta in front of a huge fan and dry it for almost two hours. Even then the oil threatened to overflow so that I had to babysit the cooking, raising the basket at threat of overflow then lowering when the oil was calm.
How does it taste?
Not bad. But definitely not worth all that effort, all that fear, house burning down. Of course it might be a whole different matter in an inch of frying pan oil but forget the deep fryer for these things.
Crispy Chilli Twists
2 cups uncooked rotini pasta (6 ounces)
Vegetable oil
2 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese
1/2 teaspoon chilli powder
1/4 teaspoon seasoned salt
1/8 teaspoon garlic powder
Cook and drain pasta as directed on package. Rinse with cold water;
drain very thoroughly (excess water on pasta will cause oil to spatter).
Heat oil (1 inch) in skillet to 375F. Fry pasta, about 1 cup at a time,
about 2 minutes or until crisp and light golden brown, stirring if
necessary to separate. Drain on paper towels. Mix remaining ingredients
in large bowl; toss with pasta until evenly coated.
16 servings (1/4 cup each)
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I did fry up some crab cakes and a few chicken fried steaks. There are no recipes for these food items as hey, it's chicken fried steak and crab steaks. Such preparation should be instinctive.
Below is a pic of the crab cakes and chicken fried steak. Actually they look pretty ugly, as if misshapen rocks retrieved from Mars. Perhaps I should study up on food photography. The cell phone and the kitchen table backdrop is not the best for food setting. But to those who have ever eaten a chicken fried steak or crab cake, well darn those food items don't look all that pretty in person either. Maybe a sprig of lettuce or a sprinkling of parsley over the top. Both food items were delicious.
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The Irish Cream Chocolate Cake, recipe below, turned out fine. Except I didn't use Irish cream because hey, I couldn't find any. I'm not even sure what Irish cream is. So I used heavy whipping cream.
Below the recipe is a picture of the cake and a slice.
Irish Cream Chocolate Cake
1 box devil's food chocolate cake mix
1 small box chocolate fudge pudding and pie filling, NOT instant
1 cup sour cream
4 eggs, beaten slightly
3/4 cup irish cream
2 cups chocolate chips
Preheat oven to 350. In bowl, combine first 5 ingredients. Beat with
mixer until smooth. Stir in chocolate chips. Pour into greased and
floured bundt pan. Bake for 45 minutes to 1 hour and 15 minutes.
Patricia Fish:
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The pie surprise was the Peanut Butter Candy Pie, recipe below. Surprising because pie-loving husband...TADA...didn't like it.
It seemed like right up his alley. "I'd rather have it be all chocolate," he said as he slowly ate a piece but with a reticence I knew well.
Damn. Now I have this whole pie hanging around. No way I can eat a pie and a cake within a week. I'm thinking the pie might last an extra week and maybe I'll have company or something.
No the dogs don't get sweets. Last resort is the compost bucket. Although I must emphasize that husband's limited taste notwithstanding, the finished product taste very good. Pic of the pie is below the recipe.
Peanut-Butter Candy Pie
1 pastry shell, unbaked (9")
3 eggs
1/2 cup sugar
1 cup light corn syrup
1 tsp. vanilla
1/4 tsp. salt
1/2 cup peanut butter
1 cup chocolate chips
1 Tbs. oil
Heat oven to 300. In a large bowl beat eggs until creamy. Gradually
add sugar. Mix well. Add corn syrup, vanilla, salt and peanut
butter. Blend thoroughly. Pour into unbaked pie shell. Bake 40-45
minutes. When pie is almost done heat chocolate chips with oil.
Remove the pie from the oven and pour chocolate mixture over the top
of the hot pie. Set aside to cool.
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We end with the potatoes.
Yes, the damn potatoes. A most ordinary of vegetables that should be a snap, right?
First potato I peeled had a huge rotten spot. A big potato, I cored out the spot figuring the rest would be fine. I only boil about six of these puppies as it's just husband and I. Mashed potatoes re-heat well but there's only so many mashed potatoes one can eat.
I had just purchased these potatoes from the grocery. Even as I perused the spud offerings I pondered what's the difference? For there were Idaho potatoes but they were more expensive than the ones I bought, called "white potatoes". There's also Yukon Gold potatoes, red potatoes, new potatoes and so on.
The differences in textures isn't lost on me and also understood is the different recipes that work better with different potatoes. But mashed potatoes? Why wouldn't ordinary ole white potatoes do for this? Besides, don't white potatoes come from Idaho too?
Because chicken fried steak requires the preparation of a milky gravy and gravy requires foods to put it on beyond the chicken fried steak. Which would be mashed potatoes.
As I peeled these potatoes I thought they felt odd. They were extremely difficult to peel and cutting them into smaller pieces darn near took an electric knife. I boiled, buttered and whipped them the same way as every mashed potato dish I've made before.
They were filled with what I can only call little potato "chips" of raw potato. I whip my potatoes with my electric mixer and most times it brings the potatoes to a nice consistency. With help from butter and milk, of course. I don't know what happened but grainy potatoes, even when topped with a handsome milk gravy, just don't cut it.
The man walked across the room and poured a cup of coffee. Turning to the attractive black lady, he pointed to his cup then to her as pantomime for offering her a cup. The black woman shifted to a more comfortable position in her chair and shook her head no.
The man returned to his chair, settled his coffee on the side table, then leaned back in his chair, folded his laced hands in his lap and gave the only other human being in the room a beaming smile.
"It's so good to finally be alone, just the two of us. This past week has been a winner, let me tell you."
The President of the United States picked up his coffee from the side table and took a long sip.
His Secretary of State smiled and said nothing. Both were content with allowing the quiet of the room envelope and soothe them, even if only momentarily and even if their discussion to come might well change history forever.
"Okay," the President said with a snap and leaned forward in a manner of serious discussion. "You're back from your trip, it's been a whirlwind I know, and we've got the press fracas under control. You've talked to the congressional committees as requested I suppose?"
Condaleeza Rice smiled. "Schumer was in a blasted mood," she responded her version of an affirmative answer. "He's been like that since he got his new co-Senator," and the Secretary of State gave an almost girlish giggle.
The President responded with a big grin. He was really fond of Condi, who he thought was one of the finest human beings to ever come forth and serve her country. Like the rest of the Republican party, he could not understand why the Democrats wouldn't embrace this vibrant, successful and articulate black woman with zeal.
"But yes," Condi continued in a more serious tone. "I spoke several times in both the House and the Senate. I've talked in depth with Rumsfeld and Cheney. And now, well it's just you and I."
The President leaned back and cast his eyes to the ceiling. "Okay, I'll call out the country. You give me the background and details."
"Sir, do you really think you need the background again? You've heard it ..."
"Yes," the President interrupted sharply but not unkindly. "I need the whole picture so tell me more rather than less."
"Egypt."
Condi took a few seconds to gather her thoughts. While doing so she shifted her position for the narrative.
"Mubarak's worried about tourism," Condi sighed, giving her usual beginning for that country.
"Yes. Egypt would be nothing but a spit of ugly land if not for the pyramids," the President responded.
"Egypt's full of Jhiadists spilling over from Saudi and Syria. He says he's GOT to keep his regime in place for a few more years."
"Those thugs he's gathered really do a good job. We should have intelligence like they get. Without that criminal network Mubarak's created the terrorists would be blowing up pyramids. Or holding them hostage. I think he's right."
"Which means he's going to have local elections in a year but somehow he's going to
gerrymander the voting districts so he'll win the next election."
"Maybe we get ole Hosni to tell us how to do that," the President said with a smile. "You sure he's not just interested in keeping his power?"
Condi smiled at the President's question. Of course Hosni Mubarak was interested in keeping his power. If Condi learned one thing in her travels this past week it was that men and women in power usually liked it and did not want to give it up. She and the other human in the room were no exceptions she supposed.
"Sir, Mubarak's regime is well entrenched. The Egyptian people are in fair shape. Their tourism industry keeps them moderate and mostly content. Terrorists attacks in Egypt would bring the country to its knees. Then all we'd have is another Syria on our hands."
"You think we should give him more time and keep sending money to keep the thugs in place? Thugs that keep the country sane and America safe mostly from angry Egyptians?"
"I'd suggest that, yes sir," Condi said, than paused hesitantly. The President raised an eyebrow. He knew there was something she wasn't saying. Which was true enough because Condi was still reluctant to make comments that seem more gossip than political discourse. Though, of course, she'd learned through the years that the gossip was as germane as the official statements when it came to assessing foreign leaders, their temperaments and inclinations. After taking a deep breath, Condi responded to the President's eyebrow.
"Mubarak has hopes of his son ascending to power. He didn't mention this to me, of course. But it's standard Egyptian scuttlebutt. He's getting on in years and after his next election he'll probably step down. I met his son. He can be worked with. When the time comes that the terrorist networks are wiped out his son could be an effective Democratic leader. Promising the position to his son would be a wonderful carrot to keep Mubarak in line."
Both parties enjoyed another minute of silence, a decision made on a rainy DC afternoon in a small anteroom off of the oval office. With all the screaming press and posturing politicians, it was the decisions of the two people in this room that would shape America's foreign policy, perhaps change world history.
The President sighed and took another sip of coffee.
"Iran?"
(To be continued)
TV This Coming Week-Not Much
…and I missed The Apprentice this past week so nothing here.
On Friday, 3/11, @ 9 pm, CNBC will feature The Contender. A new reality series, it’s about boxers who want to win big money by being the last left in the ring.
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On Saturday, 3/12, @ 8pm, TBS is showing the movie “Dumb and Dumber”. Well I’ve never seen it before.
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On Sunday, 3/13, @ 9pm, CBS premieres “Saving Millie”, the story of Mort Kondrake’s life with his Parkinson’s Diseased wife. Kondrake is ½ of Fox’s Beltway Boys team, a nice fellow if a bit on the liberal side.
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Some “Nanny” shows
I’ve taken an interest of late in the various “nanny” shows populating the TV screens. Not because the story lines are so compelling but because I get appalled.
The idea is for the importation into the household of a specially trained Nanny to solve the household family’s problems, ahem, with their children.
I don’t know why they need a Nanny judging by some recent episodes as the kids run wild, they run wild, and the parents with the big problems do not know the meaning of the word discipline.
On Monday, 3/14, @ 8pm, Fox is showing “Nanny 911”. On that same night Monday, 3/14, @ 10 pm, ABC is showing “Supernanny”. Tune in for some read child-raising insight.
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Finally, it’s the first special I’ve seen on the BTK killer. On Tuesday, 3/15 @ 9pm, The Learning Channel is featuring “BTK Killer Next Door.
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