Remember the Runaway Bride?
How about the smoking monkey?
Here’s a Pop Culture Blast from the Past. Bound to bring a smile.
God Bless America
If there’s a story, if it will sell, if Ebay will auction it off, than an enterprising American somewhere will capitalize on it.
Some cite this tendency the reason why America is hated but come on, ‘Jennifer’s High Tailin’ Hot Sauce’? Runaway Bride action figures?
Yes if Jennifer Wilbanks, shoplifter, kook and owner of buggy eyes, thought her life so muddled that she had to run from it, well her trials and tribulations are just beginning. For she will now have to face a lifetime of ridicule and by me that may be the best punishment of all.
ATLANTA (AP) — Maybe hot sauce is the cure for cold feet.
As a public service for yon readers eager to order this merchandise, links are so provided.
TO ORDER RUNAWAY BRIDE HOT PEPPER SAUCE
TO ORDER RUNAWAY BRIDE ACTION FIGURE
You are very welcome.
The Mysterious Piano Man
Many consider it an ongoing scam of some sort, the sudden appearance of a man on an English beach, dressed in full party regalia with missing tags. He has since remained mute save for the surprise of playing the piano fluidly.
If it is a scam then it’s a very well-thought out one.
FROM THE SCOTSMAN
The man, in his twenties or thirties, was found dressed in a smart suit and tie, wandering aimlessly near Sheerness, Kent on 7 April.
In a recent update
FROM THE DAILY TELEGRAPH:
Care worker Michael Camp said: "He has still not uttered a single word. He will take meals three times a day but returns immediately to his music and still recoils from human contact."
American Idol Finalists
Rapist School Teacher Finally Marries Her “Victim”
We hear the rights to photos and videotape of the wedding ran anywhere from $60,000 to $100,000.
We also hear that Vili and Mary Kay need the money.
Not that theirs is not a marriage of wedded bliss and not that we don't wish them well.
This spacey lady twelve years older than her “husband”. Said husband having no discernible job with a bleak future being a high school dropout. I’m pretty sure Mary Kay won’t be teaching school anymore.
And so God Bless America again. They are playing the public as fools. We’ll see if they win.
Mary Kay & Vili's Wedding!
The Smoking Monkey
Husband has been bemoaning the fate of the smoking monkey for a week now.
“All she wants to do is have a quiet smoke,” husband lamented. “The tobacco police won’t even leave the monkeys alone.
For the monkey has been fitted with a patch and has been weaned from her nasty habit.
The exact thing the tobacco Nazis would love to do to every smoker in America.
Soon. It’s coming soon.
Then the SUV Nazis and Fastfood Nazis can begin their campaign.
With enough time we will be a sainted, albeit miserable, nation.
FROM THE BBC
A chimpanzee has taken up smoking and spitting, according to China's Xinhua news agency.
Came across this missive, a funny but almost true saga of the daily messages of emails and Blogs. Below this is yet another saga to cause even more angst.
And Now…Dryer Lint Screens!
To start the New Year, we add the following to the anguish of the woman above.
Wash Your Dryer Lint Screens
I received this e-mail from a friend and felt I should share it:
"I had a wonderful morning, the heating unit went out of my dryer! Why does everything seem to fall apart this time of year!? The guy that fixes things went in to the dryer and pulled out the lint filter. It was clean. We always clean the lint from the filter after every load of clothes.
He told us that he wanted to show us something. He took the filter over to the sink and ran hot water over it. Now, this thing is like a mesh - I'm sure you know what your dryer's lint filter looks like - WELL... the hot water just laid on top of the mesh! It didn't go through it at all!
He told us that dryer sheets cause a film over that mesh and that's what burns out the heating unit. You can't SEE the film, but it's there. He said the best way to keep your dryer working for a very long time (and to keep your electric bill lower) is to take that filter out and wash it with hot soapy water and an old toothbrush (or other brush) at least every six months. He said that makes the life of the dryer at least twice as long! How about that? Learn something new every day!"
I certainly didn't know dryer sheets would do that. So, thought I'd share! Note: I went to dryer and tested my screen by running water on it. The water collected a little but ran though the screen. I dried it off and was ready to put it back in the dryer since the water ran through it but, I thought what the heck it
won't hurt to wash it while I had it out.
Warm soap water and a nylon brush and I had it done in 30 seconds. I then ran the water over the screen and what a difference! The water just gushed through it with no puddling at all and this time I was running the water at a faster rate. That repairman knew what he was talking about!
More Fish Giggles HERE