Pic montages and actual videos that you'll find nowhere else on the Internet.
Chef Ramsey hosts a wedding and the Food Network gang face more cooking challenges.
Predictions of winners.
Pic of the Day
Quote of the DayClassic Quotes by Gilda Radner (1946-1989) U.S. comic actor |
| TIDBITS 1. A man comes into the ER and yells, "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!" I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress, and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs -and I was in the wrong one. Submitted by Dr. Mark MacDonald, San Antonio, TX. 2. At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall. "Big breaths," I instructed. "Yes, they used to be," replied the patient. Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes, Seattle, WA 3. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I had told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more > than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a "massive internal fart." Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg, Manitoba, Canada 4. During a patient's two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed me, his doctor, that he was having trouble with one of his medications. "Which one?" I asked. "The patch. The nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and now I'm running out of places to put it!" I had him quickly undress and discovered what I hoped I wouldn't see. Yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body! Now, the instructions include removal of the old patch before applying a new one. Submitted by Dr. Rebecca St. Clair, Norfolk, VA 5. While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, "How long have you been bedridden?" After a look of complete confusion she answered..."Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive." Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson, Corvallis, OR 6. I was caring for a woman and asked, "So how's your breakfast this morning?" "It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste" the patient replied. I then asked to see the jelly and the woman produced a foil packet labeled "KY Jelly." Submitted by Dr. Leonard Kransdorf, Detroit, MI 7. A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room, when a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and wearing strange clothing, entered. It was quickly determined that the patient had acute appendicitis, so she was scheduled for immediate surgery. When she was completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff noticed that her pubic hair had been dyed green, and above it there was a tattoo that read, "Keep off the grass." Once the surgery was completed, the surgeon wrote a short note on the patient's dressing, which said, "Sorry, had to mow the lawn." Submitted by RN no name AND FINALLY!!!............... 8. As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB, I was quite embarrassed when performing female pelvic exams. To cover my embarrassment I had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly. The middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassing me. I looked up from my work and sheepishly said, "I'm sorry. Was I tickling you?"She replied, "No doctor, but the song you were whistling was, "I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Wiener". Dr. wouldn't submit his name |
"The Next Food Network Star" 2007-If You Hate It-Cook It
I thought the episode aired on 7/1/07 for Food Network's "The Next Food Network Star" was a bit mean.
First, the Food Network's current star assigned to this show was none other than my hero Alton Brown. Wow, I didn't know Alton could be so mean.
The first challenge was kind of clever. Each remaining contender (there were five at this point) were given three odd ingredients. For instance, Rory received minute steak, red radish and dried prunes. Out of these three ingredients the contenders had 30 minutes to cook something with them and three minutes to give a presentation. I thought JAG's Cornflake Tempura to be smashingly original.
It was the next challenge that was a bit mean and had all of the selection committee moaning about the lack of a star in the remaining contenders and Alton Brown begging the judges to shut it down now and start the entire 2007 contest over.
Each contender was given an ingredient that they hate. I assume Food Network knew what the contenders hated in terms of products and ingredients as a result of some sort of questionaire as each contender was surprised when they lifted the cover to their hated surprise.
Amy hates Bok Choy, JAG hates tofu, Paul despises lima beans, Rory hates goat cheese and Adrien hates little corn cobs generally used in Chinese cooking.
Rory said that she used to live on a farm and she thought that goat cheese smelled just like a male billy goat.
I gave it some thought and decided that I would hate to have to cook with black or pinto beans as there's never been anything decent made with either of these ingredients. I also imagined my fine cooking self having to prepare something with either of those beans and right then I know I would do a miserable job.
Now I suppose that was the idea of this challenge, the notion that the Next Food Network Star should be able to cook with any ingredient and also should be able to give a stellar presentation of same. Whatever the concept, it goes to logic that none of the contenders would be at their finest with this task and aspersions that none of them were stars, as one of the selection committee suggested, are unfair based on this most difficult of tasks.
This challenge was also a bit more complicated in that each contender had to create a list of talking points as a result of this task with said talking points defining their own Food Network show as each contender envisions it.
Again I think this was a terrible task for these contenders to have to accomplish this particular charge. Sure the entire concept each contender had for their own Food Network series was critical but was this the best challenge to have them define it? How is Amy supposed to encapsulate her show concept around a cooking challenge based on Bok Choy?
On this evening of 7/1/07 we also had Amy crying and boo-hooing all over the place again and hey, I understand she has children and a husband and is homesick. But the sight of Amy crying all the time gets old and I find myself hoping she'll get sent home toot de sweet.
Paul prepared a lima bean soup with parmesan crisps sides, Amy prepared a shitake udon soup with her bok choy, JAG too prepared something with "udon" in the name with his hated tofu, Rory created a tangy goat cheese salad and Adrien....well the video of Adrien's presentation is below. For Adrien was sent home on this evening and his presentation and cooking were cited as the reason why.
At the selection committee critique the judges along with Alton Brown beat up all the five contenders for stupidity, lack of culinary talent and the way they styled their hair. As I've stated, this whole cruel summary seemed a bit cruel what with the difficulty of the challenges presented.
At the critique session Amy offered to go home. After a commercial break it turned out that Amy changed her mind. By me, Amy should go home.
JAG was told by the SC (selection committee) that he has a bad temper and that his recipes are too complicated for the home chef. Rory seems to have problems presenting her culinary "point of view". Rory then declared she wanted to feature regional food from all across the U.S. The SC looked doubtful over this assertion and declared her goals too broad for a cooking show. Paul, who the SC likes by the way, was told to watch his humor, it gets a bit too silly at times and he does not finish his stories. Adrien, heh, thought he did great and smugly asserted in a private camera vignette that his experience as host of a local cooking show gives him an edge over the other contenders. Only the SC sent Adrien home. Heh.
Finally the SC declared Amy was too frantic as she gave her on-camera presentations and that her dishes were a bit too complex for the home cook. Amy was NOT sent home this week but we're hoping....soon, soon.
I see Rory and Paul as the two finalists in this thing and for now, I rather like Paul as the winner.
Remaining Contenders in Food Network's Next Star 2007 as of this date:
JAG
Amy
Rory
Paul
Links to prior reviews of the Next Food Network Star 2007:
Food Network Star's web site
6/3/07-The 2007 Search for the Next Food Network Star Begins
The Cover of Bon Appetit
Feeding the NJ Nets Fans
The Fried Meatloaf Caper
If You Hate It, Cook It
"Hell's Kitchen" 2007-The Saga of the Wedding and the Duck
On 7/2/07 Fox's "Hell's Kitchen" opened again for service only this time, for a wedding reception!
I'll always wonder why this lovely couple chose to have their wedding reception in Hell's Kitchen but hey, maybe it was free or something.
As part of the challenge this week each team, male and female, was charged with preparing a wedding banquet, this with only $100 budget for each team and 30 minutes to cook.
Before this challenge, however, each team had to prepare a sample of the dishes they'd like to feature to the bride and groom that they may choose the dishes they like. This was when the duck breast got dried out so bad my dog would've had trouble chewing it.
As the girl's team was busy working, chopping and cooking, the beautiful Melissa took it into her head that she was in charge. While both teams prepared fine meal proposals for the bride and groom to taste test, it was when the main meat dish was up for presentation that the problems arose. For the female team knew that their duck breast was dry as a board and Melissa insisted that they refuse to even present it to the bride and group.
Well the viewer could see this coming a mile away. I might not have known exactly what was under the dome that the ladies had but I knew it was something bad. Chef Ramsey pooh-poohed the women's insistance that they not have to show their meat entree to the bride and groom and surely he had to know it was bad. Why else would those females defy him like that?
Below a short video clip of how this rather funny snippet came down.
Well the "Hell's Bitches" had to be punished for embarrassing Chef Ramsey so and thus they were all charged with decorating the restaurant for the wedding. The guys, meanwhile, finally happy to have won a challenge, were treated to all manner of luxury, including massages and acupuncture.
The wedding banquet went on as planned but in the kitchen things go nuts again. For Beautiful Melissa with the ugliest hair style on the planet again became a pain in the butt and a little nuts. It was the black potatoes that was the highlight of this cussing and bitching session. For Melissa evidently didn't put her sliced potatoes under water before prep because as even I know, potatoes get black if left unpeeled and exposed to the air for any length of time. Beautiful Melissa still cooked the things and after three tries still she couldn't present a preparation of those potatoes that weren't ugly as all get out.
Chef Ramsey had Jen pick two female contenders for elimination consideration. Jen chose Melissa, natch, and Bonnie.
Then Chef Ramsey did something odd.
For Ramsey didn't send any of the contenders home on the evening of 7/2/07. Instead he moved Melissa over to the guy's team.
I don't know why Ramsey did this because I think it's time for crazy but beautiful Melissa to go.
We shall see.
So far none of the remaining contenders seems likely to run away with this thing. I don't think it will be Bonnie and not likely, Brad. Rock is a possibility but for now he's the only one I see winning the thing. For now.
Remaining Contenders for Hell's Kitchen 2007 as of this writing:
Bonnie
Melissa
Rock
Josh
Jen
Julia
Brad
Links to prior reviews of Hell's Kitchen 2007:
Web site for Hell's Kitchen
Amidst Much Cussing, on 6/4/07 the 2007 Hell's Kitchen Competition Begins
The Girls Win Everything Including Fileting the Fish
The Spaghetti Caper
The Taste Test
The Saga of the Wedding and the Duck
More TV Reviews HERE
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