Pat Fish's Blog: Thoughts, Book review, Dancing With the Stars Premiere, AI Top 13, Kaitlyn Visits Mom-Mom and We Have Our Own Movie Theater

In this week’s THOUGHTS for the week we’ve got what could possibly be a doctored pic of Paris Hilton. Think Britney Spears. She shows us her shoes but shows the camera a whole lot more. Warning, graphic.

Also a rant on Walmart, some smart thoughts on monitoring bills and, as always, political rants, good guys, bad guys and other wisdom deemed worthy of the written word.
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ABC’s “Dancing With the Stars” Premiered on 3/9/09 and it was great fun.

We’ve got a guy who is more of a comedian than dancer, the required old fart…this is a must see. Plus…tada….Melissa of Bachelor fame is a dancer and remember who spotted that entire fraud business first.

All with commentary, pics and video you’ll find nowhere else on the Internet.
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“American Idol” 2009 is getting serious now and the top 13 performed on 3/10/09. As this reality contest begins its great build up to the winner, we scrutinize closely the song choices, fashion, style and singing talents of the contenders.

If God is in his heaven the contender who should win is a dark horse but I see it plain as day. Should God be busy, there’s another who is a shoo-in.

All with commentary, pics and video you’ll find nowhere else on the Internet.
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Kaitlyn visits Mom-Mom after a long absence and a wonderful time was had by all.

We had our own movie theater and Kaitlyn poses in a most beautiful dress.
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Here’s a Book Review on a book that will keep you awake at night.

It’s short, beautifully written, a true crime story that will have you tossing and turning and maybe crying a little bit.

It’s “A Rip in Heaven” by Jeanine Cummins.
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Pic of the Day

Kaitlyn, Dr. Seuss and Smartypants

It was early March 2009 and finally, after an absence of three plus months, Kaitlyn came to visit Mom-Mom.

There’s not much going down here in the swamps of Delaware this time of year and, in fact, there was not even an afternoon children’s matinee in the local many-screened cinema. This is unheard of in the more civilized places on the planet.

So Kaitlyn and I improvised and we had a great time. I took the child to the local library and there were plenty of kids there. The library had these book things that were sort of miniature toy chests and Kaitlyn scooted down on the floor and played beside a bunch of other kids.

I allowed Kaitlyn to choose two books to check out from the library and to my delight, she chose two Dr. Seuss books. As a child Dr. Seuss was my favorite author and by me, Kaitlyn has great taste.

Since the local yokel theater disappointed us, I made a big deal about us having our very own movie screen and ordered, for the first time in my life, an on-demand movie from Comcast.

I popped us some popcorn and we both sat down and watched “Wall-E” and hey, it was fun.

We watched some TV and when “America’s Funniest Home Video” came on, Kaitlyn shouted that this was one of her favorite shows. Imagine this, I too love to watch this show. To surprise me even more, Kaitlyn mentioned the video that is one of my favorites, called The Smarty Pants Dance.

I went to Youtube and there you have it, I found the SmartyPants video. Watch it and admire my and Kaitlyn’s taste.

Sunday morning Kaitlyn and I went to Sunday mass. Kaitlyn loves to go to Sunday school, being a “little apostle”. She had a beautiful dress which she wore to church and we’ve got some fine videos…below.

”A Rip In Heaven” by Jeanine Cummins

Gray was convicted of two counts of first-degree murder and was executed by lethal injection on October 26, 2005.

I am so glad Marlin Gray is dead. In fact, I wish we could bring him back to life so we can kill him again.

Before I read this book by Jeanine Cummins, I would have, at the least, cared not a whit about Marlin, at the most, regretted the state’s action in killing a citizen, an action that I waffle about from time to time.

For sure the issue of the death penalty is an onerous one and I’m sure I am not the only citizen wrestling with the nuances of the matter.

First, there’s the news that breaks through on occasion that new DNA evidence reveals an already-convicted criminal was innocent and this is bound to give any of us pause. Second, as I am to understand, putting a criminal to death actually costs the taxpayers more than locking him or her up for life, NO possibility of parole. Third, sentiment is slowly changing here in America as our more liberal colleagues across the planet regard us as heathens for our tough death penalty stance.

Which is not to say that I have a concrete position as regards the death penalty but I do tend to accept the prevailing wisdom that perhaps it’s best to avoid this thorny issue all together. For sure spending one’s life in prison is sufficient penalty for the more heinous, so long as parole is no possibility. Although that slippery slope could be an issue in that someday maybe the bit about no parole might fall by the wayside and that’s not acceptable.

Marlin Gray and a few of his fine friends, whose parents must be so proud of their boys, decided to attack two sisters and their male cousin as the trio strolled innocently across an abandoned bridge in Missouri. They wanted “to get mean with someone”.

They raped the two girls, Julie and Robin Kerry while holding down their cousin Tom. Tom had to listen to his cousins’ torment and horror and could not help them.

After the vicious attack, the still-naked girls and Tom were forced to stand at the edge of the bridge of their torture, and without even a whisper of a thought, those fine boys pushed the three off of the bridge, to fall into a freezing Mississippi river over 70 feet below.

The history of our country is filled with victims of crime but in this case, the crime victims were to go on to suffer even more torment by the St. Louis police department and fine celebrity members of the media, one is Ricki Lake-who should be shot at sunrise.

Tom survived his plunge into the Mississippi River. He suffered a fractured hip, such was the force of hitting the water. Julie also survived the plunge but was unable to swim to safety. Tom tried his best to save his cousin but he could not. He was himself badly injured and too weak to hold on to her without drowning himself. Julie’s younger sister, Robin, did not survive. Her body was never found. Julie’s body was found a few weeks after the incident.

The book goes on to detail the events after Tom finally summoned help by climbing up a steep embankment and summoning a passing truck.

In the saddest turn of events, the St. Louis police actually thought that TOM raped and killed his cousins. Tom told his story of horror to the police, of course, begging them to please go to the river and try to find his cousins. The details are murky but the police handling of this case was as atrocious as it comes. My bile still rises at the story.

Tom did fail some sort of lie detector test. As the author points out, who is Tom’s sister by the way, sleep depravation is a major cause in failure on lie detectors. By the time got around to giving Tom a lie detector test, he had already had precious little sleep in over 48 hours.

First, the reader has to wonder what the hell those cops were thinking. If Tom had, indeed, raped his cousins, why would he include that in his story? He could have just reported them missing if he had anything to do with their demise. Further, Tom had serious injuries that were NOT tended to for the silly concentration of the St. Louis police on HIM as the criminal. He did not get medical help for a fractured hip for a few days after it all and for the St. Louis police, a fine, fine lot of gumshoes there…maybe they would have given pause as to a fellow who would rape and drown his cousins, giving himself a fractured hip from the plunge as well.

Later in the book we learn that Tom did successfully sue the St. Louis police and won a cash settlement. Wikipedia says his settlement was $150,000. This makes me happy. If ever there was dumb police work it is this sad mockery of a criminal case.

One of the fine, fine boys who participated in this crime was a kid with a very low IQ. Ricki Lake, just one of many media liberals who latched onto this case, had some sort of campaign to keep this so-called retard from the death penalty. And, indeed, Richardson’s stay of execution was granted and the creep still lives.

Ricki Lake asserted that Richardson was a juvenile and mentally retarded. When Richardson was 26 years old when the execution was scheduled and while having a low IQ, this is not QUITE the same as mental retardation. Further, it was the fine, fine Richardson, whose mother is so proud of, who pushed those nude girls off the bridge. He also managed to rape them first. He was smart enough to do that with no conscience.

Marlin Gray, as stated above, is dead. This fine, fine fellow DID get a needle and as I said with no compunction, I am glad. The world does, as I now consider, need to rid itself of creeps with no social value; creeps that rape and kill for fun; creeps with no conscience that might someday rape and kill RICKI LAKE!

Finally, as Tom’s sister describes, Tom witnessed the death of Marlin Gray but not because he wanted revenge. No. All Tom wanted was to see some sort of regret, an apology perhaps, for so horribly pushing two terrified naked girls off a bridge to their deaths, this after raping them.

Tom did not get his wish. Marlin Gray is dead, thank God. He never expressed a regret one for what he did.

The world is so much better off without him. Julie and Robin should watch him burn in hell from their perch in heaven.

Web Site for this book.

What Happened to Separation of Church and State?

What with our country having a newly elected Messiah and everything it should be no surprise that the legislatures would think nothing of interfering with church laws and such.

So here we have a Connecticut legislator,
HERE, submitting a bill that would govern just how Catholic church’s should run their parishes.

Now there were some issues with a particular parish in Connecticut. Seems a priest stole a bunch of church money and lived lavishly with his gay pal. That church’s parishioners, evidently folks who can’t go to the bathroom without help from the government, petitioned the legislators to force the church to revamp how its money is tracked lest this happen again.

The parishioners could have, I don’t know, maybe formed their own group and changed how things are handled but hey, it’s an Obama world.

The legislator who proposed the bill, now embarrassed and looking quite dumb, said that while the bill seems odd, it was merely replacing such a legislated act that already dictated how the Catholic church should be formed.

Well hey, the bill should have been to REPEAL that silly thing. Two wrongs don’t make a right, or so the saying goes. No wait. In an Obama world, two wrongs DO make a right.

Walmart and Comcast-RANT

I’m not too awful upset with Walmart but Comcast? Folks, watch this company with jaundiced eye. Do not trust them a whit

On 2/18/09 I ordered a new monitor for husband’s computer as his monitor has creases and weird things all over the place and his birthday was 2/28/09.

I was sent an email verifying my order and told it would be delivered to my store by 3/6/09. Well husband and I never did stand on ceremony and for his birthday I printed out that exact notice and told him on 3/6/09 I would pick up his monitor.

Came 3/6/09 and by now I don’t know what’s going on. There’s been no notice of monitor delivery but since I had to stop at Walmart anyway I checked in.

No delivery.

I went home and checked the “tracking” of my order. It was shipped to my local yokel store and would arrive by 3/6/09. Well it was early in the day, perhaps it would arrive later, so I figured.

The next day I get an email from Walmart. “Do not worry,” as I paraphrase. “There is a delay in shipping your order. Very often the order arrives a day or two later.”

So hey, I didn’t worry. Only a few days later, I get an email. A credit has been placed on my gift card for the purchase price. So they gave me my money back. That’s good I guess. Did this mean the monitor would NEVER be shipped? Better I got the money back than not but still, no explanation given.

I checked the tracking again it says, get this, my order would be shipped on 3/1/09. NOW WE ARE GOING BACKWARDS IN TIME!!

I wrote Walmart an email and finally got a human being. Unfortunately my order was lost in transit. I had to wonder how this happened as the tracking showed it shipped from Smyrna, Delaware but never arriving at the Georgetown store. Did an employee steal the thing?

Walmart would ship another monitor to my house with no shipping charge, and instructions on bringing this to fruition were given.

I suppose that Walmart handled this okay but it seems to me that there were some glaring and confusing gapes in their system. Not to mention disappointing my husband on his birthday.

I searched the Internet for a similar monitor as that from Walmart and NONE, anywhere, is cheaper. I will probably take Walmart up on their offer.

Now Comcast. My monthly Comcast bill had been $185. Not cheap but it included high-speed Internet, some premium movie channels that husband likes, the basic service plus rental of this and rental of that.

Husband got a new HDTV and suddenly my Comcast bill goes up to $285 a month! One hundred dollars a month increase?

I pulled out that bill and absolutely none of the charges made any sense. There was a charge for DVR service of $15.90 a month. There was another charge for DVR service of $31.95 a month. We do have two DVR’s but something wasn’t right with this picture.

Then there was a charge of $8.90 for something, something, and another charge of $12.95 for something, something.

So I called up Comcast, who wouldn’t be cheating me or anything, would they? Turns out that I was being charged triple for the DVR svc, I was being charged double for HD service, there were three bogus equipment rental charges on the bill.

Folks, review your cable bills, PLEASE. I got the bill reduced by half what they were charging and a credit for overbilling since December of last year.

Do NOT assume they have it right. And anytime the thing changes, check it over. Cable companies hire idiots too.

Paris Hilton Shows Off Her, Er, Shoes?

It’s quite possible this picture is doctored but it sure looks real. If it’s genuine, wow, Paris makes Britney look like a piker.

GOOD GUY OF WEEK

I watched this contretemps between Ari Fleischer, former Press Secretary for President Bush, and the awful Chris Matthews as it unfolded. I was screaming at my television because Chris Matthews, his Hardball show watched by me and a few other people, is such, well the word asshole comes to mind.

Ari Fleischer is trying to answer Chris’ questions. Chris Matthews does, as yon reader may know, adore The Messiah Obama, once professing that the man sent thrills up his leg. Spitting as is his unclean wont, Chris kept shouting at Ari, accusing him of defending President Bush.

Finally, exasperated, Ari said, with clenched jaw, that he defends Obama, why can’t he-Ari-defend his boss and isn’t that why Chris invited him on the show? The shouting match continued on, the video below.

Good on you, Ari! Too many pubbies have fine tans, head hairs that never budge from their appointed places and friends across the aisle. It’s about time some of you guys shout back at these liberals who scream, spit and intimidate.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

BAD GUY OF WEEK

The Bad Guy of the Week is Charles Freeman, a little known Obama appointee whose disastrous nomination for
Director of Intelligence flew under the Lamestream Media radar.

I am not Jewish but I’ve worked for many Jews. There is section of the Jewish populace referred to as self-hating Jews. These were the guys manning the watchtowers in the German concentration camps.

Charles Freeman is just such a Jew.

First, he was a spokesman for the Saudi regime and what the hell is a Jew doing defending these sons of camels? Second, rather than bowing out gracefully, this Freeman character has to make some snide comment about the “Jewish cabal” out to get him.

What a loser. I thought that this kind of Jew disappeared with the creation of Israel.

Charles Freeman’s paranoid statement about the Jews out to get him.

The Messiah Will Pay Your Mortgage

This mortgage payoff scheme of Obama’s is not going over very well with the American public. Nor should it.

If Americans understand anything it’s buying a house, equity in a house, paying the mortgage.

Now I hear that Acorn, that mahvelous community organization that caused this housing mess, with some help from the Messiah, to begin with, is going to couple with Move-on.org and generate political commercials that will show folks getting evicted from their homes.

This is NOT going to go over well. In fact, for about one single day, Acorn got together and started what they called a “peaceful protest”. What they did, they would block the door when a sheriff showed up to evict a resident of a home that was being foreclosed upon.

This lasted one day. The public showed no sympathy.

If you don’t pay the mortgage, what, you think Americans are going to get boo-hoo over you getting evicted? You don’t think we’d all like to NOT pay our mortgages?

We shall see how well these maudlin commercials asking for tears for the school bus driver getting booted out of her $800,000 home that she shouldn’t have bought to begin with.

The Messiah’s honeymoon with America is almost over. This mortgage thing is going to bring him down.

Ending With a Smile

American Idol-2009-Top 13-New Rule for Judges

The new rule is that the judges will be able to save one contestant voted off the show by the American viewers. Only one and just one and none after the pool goes down to the final five.

The thought is that a few former contenders, Chris Daughtry being one, were voted off way too soon for the success that he later achieved. And let’s not forget the fine Sanjaya who remained in the competition way longer then he should have. Talk radio troublemaker Howard Stearn was urging his listeners to vote for Sanjaya and while that whole stunt was a hoot, SOMEBODY was getting the boot earlier than intended because of this trickery by outside forces.

It seems a good rule although I caution about the famous slippery slope and hope that this reality show that I quite enjoy does not become property of the judges. The democracy of the show, and its many copycats, is part of the allure.

So on to the show on 3/10/09 and the elimination show the following night.

It was Michael Jackson night and frankly, I don’t like either Michael of the Jackson Five all that much. Although the songs are often familiar to most Americans and can create a showcase for these contenders, it can backfire, read on.

I am, as are most Americans now watching the show and as will those who will likely join in when the competition narrows down, honing in on those I think will win and those I really like. Which are not necessarily the same ones.

Lil Rounds is one I think will make the top five, definitely. She sang “The Way You Make Me Feel”. Lil has a powerhouse voice; I dub her a Fantasia with class. Lil is married to her baby daddy and has three children. She’s got stage presence and she wore a fetching and so fashionable one-shoulder blouse over white pants. She looked terrific. Simon said he hated her outfit and right there we know Lil’s a winner. Simon’s been wearing the same Tshirt for the last ten years. You can take what he knows about fashion and shove it up the behind of a flea. At that it would still rattle around like a beebee in a box car.

Scott MacIntyre plays the piano, is legally blind and appealing in a way that brings out the mother in us. His mother said that his sister was also sight-impaired, both she and Scott having some sort of sight issue that is described as looking at the world through a soda straw.

Scott’s mother hastened to assure us that no one else in the family has ever had any sight-impairment issues but come on, two kids with this rare sight problem can’t be a coincidence.

Doesn’t mean anything save dreamy women who might like some private time with Scott should think of their future children.

Scott sang “Keep the Faith”. Simon hated the song because nobody knows it and, indeed, I didn’t know it. But Scott did a fine job with the tune and while I’ll not yet commit Scott as a top-fiver, I suspect he’ll be around for a while.

Danny Gorkey sang “Pretty Young Thing”, another tune I didn’t know but don’t judge popularity of a tune by me. Simone called Danny a “white guy with soul” and Paula, dear Lord, the woman cried.

I don’t especially like Danny but he’s got a fan base out there. So far he seems to be this year’s rocker.

Speaking of Paula Abdul, I just have to say this. The women acts like she’s on some serious pain medication or else she’s just drunk. I suppose I could get sued for saying such a thing on this Blog read by two, maybe three people.

Compare Paula’s behavior to Kara’s, for example, and notice the difference.

Not that there’s anything wrong with this.

Michael Sarver sang “You’re Not Alone”. Well at this point in the competition all of these contenders are good singers. I’m not at all Sarver could beat out a Lil Rounds is what I’m saying here.

Jasmine Murray is a pretty young thing. She sang “I’ll Be There” and now here’s a tune I know.

Alas Jasmine was sent home the following night and I have to agree with the voters. Jasmine was in the bottom two and the judges passed on saving her to move on.

Kris Allen plays the guitar and I’ve got a special admiration for those singers playing an instrument. Kris sang “Remember the Time” but you gotta love Comcast, my cable provider. Their digital service burped while Kris was singing and I didn’t hear a word of it.

Allison Iraheta is an adolescent of 16 years I believe. This young thing has a dynamite voice and if singing was the only criteria, Allison would definitely be in the top five and is the closest competition Lil Rounds has of the female contenders.

Allison, however, does not have a great stage presence and goodness she’s a young thing but her interview technique is seriously lacking.

Allison sang “Give It Too Me” and she performed well. She looked like a biker chick to me and I don’t know if America’s going to like that. Also, she really needs to tone down that red brass in her hair. This sort of look does well in the dives down the ocean but on American Idol it might work against her.

Anoop Desai, I was sure he was going to get voted off on elimination night. Anoop sang “Beat It” and it was just so-so. Anoop, as you might know by the name, is an American of Indian descent. He just looked so odd singing that song.

Jorge Nunez sang “Never Can Say Goodbye” and Simon liked to go nuts with his lambaste of the night.

Jorge was sent packing on elimination night and while I think it should have been Anoop, Jorge wouldn’t have lasted in this contest much longer.

Megan Joy Gokey is my own personal favorite but I doubt she’ll last into the top five. Megan has a very unusual kind of song genre and the judges know it. In fact, the judges made Megan one of their wild card choices because Megan is not a popular singer in the classic sense of the word.

Gokey is an Amy Whitehouse kind of singer and I think she will definitely be picked up by a record label because there’s a place for these kind of singers even if not American Idol winners.

Her voice is not the best, she’s very pretty but an argument could be made she’s not the prettiest, her stage presence is odd as she does those swaying kind of movements singers in her genre do. Megan sang “Rocking Robin” and Simon did a fine lambaste about this song choice as well.

Frankly I can’t think of many Michael Jackson songs that would suit Megan’s song style and I suppose that this choice was as good as any. I understand Simon’s concern, however, because that song did nothing to showcase Megan’s uniqueness as she needs to be showcased.

Adam Lambert, now here’s an interesting contender. As I understand it, Adam is gay and it’s no big secret. There are pics across the Internet of Adam with other guys as I hear it. Maybe I’ll search around and post some should I find them.

Adam is a performer let there by no doubt and right now, subject to change as I assert, I see this year’s contest narrowing down to Lil and Adam.

Will Adam’s gayness work against him? It shouldn’t. And he has the look to be a great Elvis impersonator.

Matt Giraud plays the piano and has a very versatile and interesting voice. So far I don’t see any of these more “normal” white guys as outstanding, to include Matt.

Matt sang a tune I didn’t know, something about human nature. Whatever the case, it was okay. I’d give it a C+.

Alexis Grace finished up the show singing “Anna”. All of the judges agreed, in some fashion, that Grace “oversang” the song.

Well I am not familiar with this song but Grace sure belted it out.

Alexis has an appeal. She’s cute with a good voice, nice stage presence. I don’t know that she owns any particular song genre and her father is certainly a weird guy.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

If nothing else, Alexis is going to go the Katharine McPhee route, using sexy shorts to generate viewer votes her performance might not garner.

So I now predict three singers who will make it to the top 5, with reservations about Allison: Adam Lambert, Lil Rounds, and Allison Iraheta.

Adam Lambert
Alexis Grace
Allison Iraheta
Anoop Desai
Danny Gokey
Jasmine Murray-sent home 3/11/09
Jorge Nunez-sent home 3/11/09
Kris Allen
Lil Rounds
Matt Giraud
Megan Joy
Michael Sarver
Scott MacIntyre

Finally, Kelly Clarkson sang her new tune on elimination night. It’s a good song with a terrific title, heh: “My Life Sucks Without You”. Glad to see Kelly’s doing great and was glad to see her back.

Below, a video of the highlights of the Top 13 down to 11 show, with my commentary inserted in the video clips.

ABC’s “Dancing With the Stars” Premieres

ABC’s DWS Web Site

-Ty Murray-Jewel’s husband, rodeo star
-Holly Madison-on “Girls Next Door”
-Belinda Carlisle-lead singer Go-Go's
-David Alan Grier-Actor
-Shawn Johnson-17 years old...olympic gold medal winner
-Lil Kim-rapper, singer and actress
-Gilles Marini-Actor
-Steve-o-MTV Star
-Melissa Rycroft-Bachelor star
-Denise Richards-Actress-married to a Sheen
-Lawrence Taylor-NY Giants football Hall of Famer
-Chuck Wicks-singer and songwriter
-Steve Wozniak-Apple computer wiz

Okay, we’ve got all the contenders and their partners straight, including the two who dropped out and their replacements.

Country singer Jewel and “Access America” hostess Nancy O’Dell both dropped out due to injuries. They were replaced by Holly Madison and Bachelor Star Melissa Rycroft, respectively.

I find it most intriguing that Melissa Rycroft was recruited for this series because I followed The Bachelor series extensively and asserted that I thought Melissa was just a plant and that entire dramatic ending having Melissa getting rejected on nationwide TV by Bachelor Jason Mesnick to have been scripted solely to gain Melissa just such national attention, HERE.

On premiere night, the Cha-Cha-Cha and Waltz were the featured dances. Lil Kim began the festivities along with her partner, Derek Hough. They danced a Cha-Cha. I thought they made a fine looking couple but considered the performance somewhat ho-hum. The judges liked Lil Kim and she looks like a contender in this thing.

Lil Kim was awarded 21 points.

Belinda Carlisle of the Go-Gos performed a waltz to the tune of “What the World Needs Now”. Bruno called Belinda “Cloris Leachman” and called her dance style “heavy”.

Cloris Leachman was a contender on last year’s show and she is in her 80’s. Belinda Carlisle didn’t look near that old but Bruno did compare the two.

Belinda and her partner were awarded 17 points.

Lawrence Taylor with his partner Edita of the long last name performed a cha-cha. Taylor is a former football player. These types tend to do well on this show. The judges said it looked like Lawrence was having “fun”, a euphemism for a poor dancer that smiles while cutting up.

Taylor did not seem to have that natural athletic grace that those of his ilk before him had.

Lawrence was awarded 16 points.

The record shows Steve-O to be an MTV star. I never heard of him. Steve and his partner Lacey Schwimmer performed a waltz. The judges said they expected the worst but again, they found the performance “funny”. IE “you’re no dancer but you made me laugh”.

Steve O of MTV fame received 17 points.

So okay, here’s the hottie to look out for. His name is Gilles Marini and he’s a star from “Sex in the City”. He is extremely easy on the eyes. He and his partner, Cheryl Burke, did a Cha-Cha and they received the highest score of the night-24 points.

Chuck Wicks is his partner Julianne Hough’s fiancé. This is an intriguing turn of events for this show. One might think they’d have all the time in the world to practice. Wicks and Hough performed a waltz to the tune of “Are You Lonesome Tonight?”

I think I saw a stumble by Wicks during the dance. Wicks and his partner received 20 points from the judges.

Holly Madison did a cha-cha-cha and since she is a last-minute replacement for Jewel, we are to understand that she got very little practice. She and her partner Dmitry did a Cha-Cha and she did okay for such a small amount of time to prepare. Holly, of “Girls Next Door” fame, got 18 points for their performance.

Ty Murray is a cute guy, a rodeo star and Jewel’s husband. Ty is pared with a new professional dancer, Chelsea Hightower.

Ty is an awkward guy, at best, and not even funny at it. Ty and his partner got the second lowest score of the night, a mere 14 points. Don’t look for Jewel’s husband to run off with this thing.

Shawn Johnson is billed as the youngest contender ever on Dancing With the Stars. Along with her partner, Mark Ballas, she performed a waltz.

Shawn is a gold-medal winning Olympic gymnast but don’t tell anyone I said this. I think she’s a little chubby for a gymnast.

I thought her dance was one of the better performances of the night. Look for Shawn to be one of the finalists in this thing. Shawn got 23 points for her performance.

Okay, so you gotta have one old person. Steve Wozniak, an executive with Apple computer, fills that role.

Watching Steve dance a Cha-Cha with his partner Karina Smirnoff my first thought was “this is a joke, right?”

Steve got the lowest scores of the night, receiving a mere 13 points from the judges.

I suspect Steve will be the first sent home although hey, DWS viewers tend to keep the oddest around for their perverted amusement longer than expected.

David Alan Grier is some sort of actor. He performed a waltz with his partner Kim Johnson.

While I’d only give Grier’s performance a C+, he did smile during the entire dance and frankly, it looked damn odd.

Grier and his partner received 19 points for their performance.

Denise Richards does not have much personality save she tends to cry a lot. She is partnered with Maksim, who always wears his shirt unbuttoned, heh.

I was able to control myself what with Maksim’s chest prancing in front of me and, ho-hum, ho-hum.

Denise and her partner received 18 points.

Finally, the most intriguing dancer this year, we have Melissa Rycroft of recent The Bachelor fame. Rycroft received only 2 days of practice but she performed a fine waltz.

Melissa is, or was, a Dallas cheerleader and had extensive ballet lessons as a child so it is said. Melissa got a standing ovation, both for her amazing rebound from an alleged broken heart delivered by Jason Mesnick as well as her fine performance with so little practice.

Melissa and her partner Tony received 23 points from the judges and that’s terrific for such a small amount of practice time.

Look for Melissa Rycroft to be a real contender for this thing and go on to fame and stardom as I predicted in my Bachelor post with proof as to how her entire schtick on The Bachelor was scripted to exactly this end.

It’s tough being right all the time but somebody’s gotta do it.