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Samba and Rumba and Seven are Left
There were eight couples on 4/16/07 when Clyde Drexler was finally voted off. While this was no surprise, Heather Mills falling in the bottom two was. For sure Billy Ray Cyrus needs to go home soon. Heather is a dancer with one freaking leg and she does a hell of a job with it. But then this year's "Dancing With the Stars" seems to be anathema to females as they've been voted off in droves right from the start while males with questionable talent remained to dance again.
The Samba, we are told, is a party dance consisting of rhythmical forward moves. The Rumba is a dance featuring slow, seductive movemtns with many rope spins and "rumba walks".
Ian led the night off with a Samba. Dressed in all black, Ian certainly has the build and silhouette of a real dancer. The judges took exception to Ian's performance, declaring it was time for him to go to "the next level". I thought Ian did a fine job but the judges have a point. Ian needs to pack a punch from now on because he's got Apolo and Joey Fatone competing against him and they've moved on several levels beyond Ian. Ian and his partner got 24 points out of 30 for their performance.
Clyde and his partner did a Rumba. For some reason I didn't understand, Clyde was in China during the week he needed to practice. As stated earlier, Clyde was eliminated on the following night's elimination show. Which should have happened because as my notes indicate, the man dances by standing perfectly still and moving his feet. Clyde and his partner danced to the tune "What's Going On". It was a very bad performance, garnering 13 points out of a possible 30. Clyde is no longer in this year's competition and even he's glad it's over.
Moving on to Heather we have a Samba. First, however, for reasons unclear to me, Heather's partner underwent a procedure to remove the hair from his chest.
First, I LIKED the hair on his chest for God's sake. Second, it's not like the fellow had just a few hairs on his chest, goodness. His entire chest was covered with hair-fur, a masculine trait that was a bit of a turn-on. The wax procedure was filmed in detail and it was cruel, yon ladies and gems, just cruel.
Heather wore a dress with a hem of varying lengths, allowing a viewer to see both of her legs and for the life of me, I couldn't tell which one was fake.
I wasn't thrilled with the choreography of Heather's dance routine but the judges declared it a "great performance" and awarded Heather and her partner 21 points out of 30.
Joey Fatone stepped onto the dance floor and began a sexy Rumba. For a snicker, I noted that the tune that Joey and his partner danced to was "Besame Mucho", the same tune sung by American Idol's Sanjaya on Latin night.
The judges said that Fatone's performance was "feminine" and "overperformed". First, of all the male performers this year, or at least the ones who can really dance, Fatone is the most masculine of them all. No way does this guy dance like a girl. Ian? Definitely. Apolo? Occasionally. Joey Fatone is a man's man dancer.
Joey and his partner received 25 points out of a possible 30.
Former "Cheers" Star John Ratzenberger performed a Samba to the tune "Love Is In the Air". I would characterize John's performance as akin to a father dancing at his daughter's wedding. He's passable as a non-professional dancer but sort of lunkish in a father-of-the-bride way.
The judges, however, greatly enjoyed Ratzenberger's performance, declaring it was "great fun" even though the footwork got a little messed up. Ratzenberger received a standing ovation from one judge and was awarded 18 points out of 30 points.
Laila, daughter of former champion boxer Mohammad Ali and also a boxer herself, performed a Rumba. Laila's fiance joined Laila and her professional dancer partner during the pre-dance vignette. I couldn't shake the notion that he was a jealous fellow and wanted to comfort himself that Laila was not into hanky-panky with her dance partner.
Laila danced a Rumba to the tune of "Three Little Birds". I thought the dance kind of boring at the start but it got very sexy and appealing as the dance continued on.
The judges declared Laila was the "comeback kid" and named the female boxer "Lucious Laila". Laila and her partner received a total of 28 points out of 30.
Apolo and his partner performed the dance of the night and this guy is going to be hard to beat. Performing a Samba to a rap-type song, this dance team moved their hips, feet, arms and other sexy body parts to dancing perfection. The judges adored Apolo's performance and Apolo and his partner got the first perfect score of the 2007 competition....30 points!
The evening ended with Billy Ray Cyrus performing a Rumba to the tune "What's Love Got to Do With It". Understand that Billy Ray Cyrus is no dancer and he'd be the first to admit it. His dancing was awkward and boxy, sort of like a country/western singer dancing a Rumba.
The judges compared Cyrus' performance to screwing in the back seat of a Chevy. To which Cyrus pointed out that he's had some great times in the back seat of a Chevy and the man had a point.
Billy Ray and his partner received 17 points out of a possible 30. I predict that Cyrus will be gone from this year's competition soon.
My prediction for the top three this year:
1-Apolo Ohno
2-Ian Ziering
3-Laila Ali
DANCE WITH STARS LIST 2007
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Ian Ziering
Billy Ray Cyrus
Joey Fatone
Laila Ali
John Ratzenberger
Heather Mills
Apolo Anton Ohno
DANCING WITH STARS POST LINKS
OPENING NIGHT
Quick Step and Rumba Night
Ten Down to Nine
Nine Down to Eight
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"The Bachelor"-Officer and Gentleman-4/16/07
I continue to watch this reality series and it keeps me interested enough to continue tuning in. On the night of 4/16/07 we had two "group dates", a twisted ankle, and one "2 for 1" date. There was also a visit to boot camp and three would-be fiances of Andy Baldwin were sent home.
Allow me to elaborate.
The show began with the introduction of some stereotypical drill sargeant character whose job was to whip the ladies into shape and give them a glimpse into life in the military. As Andy Baldwin, 2007 bachelor is a Lieutenant in the U.S. Navy.
He made the girls scrub the bathroom floor with a toothbrush and perform military style exercises. Bevon, a contender for Andy, hurt her ankle during one exercise routine. As almost pre-ordained, in comes Doctor Andy who feels up Bevon's swollen foot then sends her off to the hospital. Which I could have done and I'm no doctor. All for the drama of the thing I imagine.
For the first group date, Amber, two Stephanies and Tina all went to a spa. The spa featured a mud bath, all for therapy of course. However it's couched, we had a bunch of scantily clad ladies wallowing around in wet mud with lucky Andy joining in on the fun.
For each group date, one lady would be chosen by Andy for some special "one on one" time with Andy. During the mud bath group date, Stephanie W was chosen for a special time with Andy. Stephanie was "rewarded" with the privelage of giving Andy a massage. Which she did, telling us each time she rubbed Andy's prone body how "hard" his body and muscles were. Heh. Notice how sex lurks right under every activity on this show.
Not that this is a bad thing. Heh.
For a second group date, Erin, Kate, Danielle and Amanda joined Andy for a few hours at the race track.
Andy, it seems, has a fondness for fast cars. So the ladies chosen for this group date were expected to actually drive a race car around the track with Andy as passenger. Erin is a blonde contender and this woman fits every blond stereotype I've ever heard. Andy declared during one of his private vignettes, that Erin reminded him of a "Barbie doll". Heh. It turned out that Erin could not drive a stick shift and why does this surprise anyone? Oddly, Andy chose Erin as his choice for special private time on this group date and a realization hit me.
Being chosen for special private time does not necessarily mean that the bachelor is particularly interested in the female chosen. I knew as soon as Andy picked Erin for the special private time that he was planning on sending her packing. I think he gave her some extra time to "redeem" herself from her personal hell as a Blonde dumbell. She did not. Later that night, Erin was not given a rose. Andy done sent her home.
Tessa and Peyton were chosen for the coveted "2 for 1" date. How this works...two ladies are chosen to go on a date with Andy. Andy has only one rose. At the end of this literal "double" date, one of the ladies would be given a rose by Andy. The other would be going home.
Andy and his two dates visited an aircraft carrier featuring a real helicopter. Andy gave his rose to Tessa and Peyton was sent home.
Later still, Andy spent some private time with Amanda. This was during an evening at the mansion with ALL the ladies in attendance. When Andy chose to go outside for a few words with Amanda I knew she would be going home. Amanda was tongue-tied and hardly fine company.
Every one of these women declare that they are Andy's soul mate. Well damn they ALL can't be his soul mate, right? I mean we only have one or two soul mates on this planet, isn't that the popular wisdom?
I've not seen any amazing personality or intelligence thrusting out from these ladies but given time I suppose it'll come out.
Andy did give one of the females on his "2 for 1" date a kiss, the first one I've seen between Andy and one of the contenders so far during this competition and it was a pathetic peck of two hard lips of Andy. Damn I hope he kisses better than that.
For now, goodbye to Erin (who needed to go), Amanda, and Peyton.
Do I have any possibilities right now out of the nine left? Well he seems to like Tessa and Stephanie, I'm not sure which Stephanie. We'll be keeping an eye out for possible finalists in future shows.
BACHELOR 2007 LINKS-Officer and Gentleman
Let the Roses Begin
Wiggly Jiggly Boob Night
Down to Nine
More TV Reviews HERE
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