TV-The 2008 Oscars, a Review, Commentary, Fashion Update, Sarcasm; Celebrity Apprentice Update

Couple of TV updates.

Of course we'll have commentary and sarcasm on the Oscars, some fashion critiques and a few well-deserved verbal slaps. Again, all with video and pics you'll find nowhere else on the Internet.

And the "Celebrity Apprentice" 2008 plows along.

Both teams did a fine job creating a QVC segment but someone still had to go.

The most beloved of all was sent home.

TIDBITS

I am sure you know how this goes....this pretty much sums up my days....
I have read this before but it still is so true.....

Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D.
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.
This is how it manifests:
I decide to water my garden.

As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.

As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that Ibrought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first.
But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only one check left.



My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke I'd been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

The Coke is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need water.

I put the Coke on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning.

I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote.

Someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for the remote,
but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.

I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.

Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:
the car isn't washed
the bills aren't paid
there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter
the flowers don't have enough water.

There is still only 1 check in my check book,

I can't find the remote,
I can't find my glasses,
& I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all damn day, and I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail....

---

 


”Celebrity Apprentice” 2/21/08

I had a wonderful pic montage of this episode of Donald Trump’s “Celebrity Apprentice” 2008 complete with pics of the QVC products each team would hype and happening pics of the respective project managers. But when I pulled up this mighty fine pic absolutely nothing was in the confines of the pic’s virtual borders.

I don’t know what I did but I’m not about to go at it all over again. There’s plenty of pics in the Oscar post below so let’s delve into what happened the night the Hydra team, now consisting of Piers Morgan, Carol Alt and Lenox Lewis went up against the Empresario team, now consisting of Omarosa, Stephen Baldwin, Tito Ortez and Trace Adkins, competed by selling stuff.

Marilu Henner got fired in this episode. It was the right choice but it was sad. Marilu had become a cherished member of whatever team she was on, she was personable, she worked hard, she was liked by everyone.

The Hydra team chose to promote the sale of a ladder/hand truck combination on a QVC show. Marilu was the project manager for this task as she supposedly has a history with QVC sales. Her teammate Carol Alt was also experienced with QVC sales.

The Empresario team chose to sell a cordless vacuum type of thing that could be recharged via charger and used without bother of cords all over the place. Stephen Baldwin was project manager for this task and thank the Lord that during this episode we didn’t have to suffer through another visit by Stephen’s insufferable brother, one Alec Baldwin who I despise.

The winning team would be the one who sold the most of their chosen item.

Marilu was the chosen salesperson for the ladder/handtruck item, a right handy thing that I kind of liked, being a shopper and all that. Trace Adkins, oddly, was the salesperson chosen for the Empresario team and hey, the tall fellow did okay selling a vacuum cleaner of all things and I had no idea he had five daughters. God Bless him.

More rechargeable, cordless vacuums were sold than the ladder/handtruck combo. Besides the actual product, the major difference between the two team’s sales techniques was that one team used what is called “EZ Pay” and the other did not.

But of course!

It’s a bit like charging $3.99 for an item instead of $4.00. Sure there’s only a penny difference and the oddball change is a bit of a pain. But people SEE the THREE or the FOUR and the item priced a penny lower has the edge.

So too, a price that flashes across the screen as “three easy payments of $19.99 each” will be viewed more favorably by the consumer as opposed to “$29.99 each”.

The Hydra team, even though it had two members with prior QVC experience, knew nothing about the EZ payment choice while Empresario used the EZ payment feature and hey, they won the competition.

So Stephen Baldwin’s family charity, a notion that I inherently distrust although they do need a “Alec Baldwin learns how to be a decent father” charity, won $20K while Marilu Henner got sent home from the Hydra team.

“Celebrity Apprentice” 2008 Contenders
======================
Carol Alt-model/actress
Jennie Finch-olympic medalist softballsent home 1/24/08
Gene Simmons from Kiss-sent home 1/17/08
Lennox Lewis-boxer
Marilu Henner-actress-sent home 2/21/08
Nadia Comaneci-olympic star gymnast-sent home 1/10/08
Nely Galen-Latina TV producer-sent home 2/7/08
Omaroasa-former apprentice
Piers Morgan-Americas Got Talent
Stephen Baldwin-actor of Baldwin family
Tiffany Fallon-playmate of year-SENT HOME PREMIERE NIGHT 1/3/08
Tito Ortez
Trace Adkins-country star
Vincent Pastore-star of sopranos-sent home for Croc challenge 1/28/08

Prior Links to Posts for “Celebrity Apprentice” 2008
======================
Premiere Show
The Dog Challenge; Nadia Gets Fired
The Kodak Challenge…KISS Him Goodbye
Hydra Loses the Broadway Challenge; Finch Sent Home
Vinnie Pastore Goes Home
Nely Galen Sent Home
The Omarosa/Piers Morgan Feud Begins in Ernest
Beloved Marilu Henner Fired!

The Oscars 2008

Yes we’ve got gossip, opinions, sarcasm, brickbats and other fine prosaic tools later on re the 2008 80th Broadcast of the Academy Awards but first:

Things I Learned From the Movies

The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No-one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty.

Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.

A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

Kitchens don't have light switches. When entering a kitchen at night, you should open the fridge door and use that light instead.

Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames.

Wearing a vest or stripping to the waist can make a man invulnerable to bullets.

If you find yourself caught up in a misunderstanding that could be cleared up quickly with a simple explanation, for goodness sake, keep your mouth shut.

A cough is usually the sign of a terminal illness.

All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.

One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them than 20 men firing at 1 man.

It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts -- your enemies will patiently attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.

Most people keep a scrapbook of newspaper clippings - especially if any of their family or friends have died in a strange boating accident.

When paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you take out a bill -- just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.

All computer disks will work in all computers, regardless of software.

When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.

When driving a car it is normal to look not at the road but at the person sitting beside you or in the back seat for the entire journey.

It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.

An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight year old child.

Having a job of any kind will make fathers forget their son's eighth birthday.

Honest and hard working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.

Well hey, I thought it was cuter than all get out.

Anyway, first things first about this year’s Oscar celebration. Let it be known that myself, although wise as the high blue sky, rarely watches a movie of any kind, much less the oddball ones that always seem to get the nod to receive an Oscar. Thanks to a granddaughter now old enough to sit through a movie and my cessation of smoking, I DO, on occasion, see a movie, one of which did receive an Oscar nomination. More on this later.

So just like most everybody else across the fruited plains who bothers watching this show, I know nothing about the movies nominated and I mostly watch because it seems the American thing to do.

Let the record show that I have zero, nada, zilch envy of any of those poor folk who have to primp and display themselves and their clothing in much the same manner as a fine dog breed in the Westminster show ring. I really believe those actor people really think those of us out here in la-la land adore them, love them, desire their clothes, want to live their exciting lives of pretending to be someone we’re not.

Well hey, let’s not disabuse them of that notion, what you say? I like to sit and wonder what such a shallow and vapid life must be like and frankly I’d rather be on THIS side of the TV than on that red carpet.

They amuse me is what I’m saying here and hey, if they get to ride around in limos and wear designer gowns for their efforts, this is fine with me.

Now, what the hell is with the ponytails?

Not that this isn’t just a fine hairstyle that I myself have worn most of my life but mostly, let’s be honest here, ponytails as a hairstyle is mostly for children, no?

Obviously not in that all night from Jennifer Garner to Mylie Cyrus, everybody had their hair pulled back into a ponytail and hey, it hardly seems fair. Hair should have to take hours to sculpt, craft, curl and rearrange to a dashing confection of a hair-helmet to impress the masses. Well yeah, we had some of that too.

Some other random thoughts on the 2008 Oscar proceedings and then onto the pic montages and finally to a video remix of the Oscar nominated songs for the 2008 Academy Awards.

George Clooney. In all of this planet earth is there any individual more full of himself than this guy?

Not that there’s anything wrong with that and hey, the guy’s handsome, rich and can have any female with but a flick of a finger. He acts, he directs, he produces, he has fun, all day, every day, 24/7.

I’d really hate to be George Clooney but I do enjoy watching him shine so much he blinds even himself.

Steve Carell’s routine was not funny at all. In fact, I forget what it was about already and only have my rather cryptic notes. My notes note that maybe the writers should have stayed on strike if this is the best they could come up with. At any rate, Steve Carell will always be the forty year old virgin in my mind and hey, it’s the price you pay for being an actor.

I most enjoy the Academy Awards when they do those flashback montages. This is likely, as I surmise, one of this annual show’s most popular features. They should never stop offering this most enjoyable part of this award show as we’ve all been young, we’ve all seen movies, we all have bittersweet memories those vignettes bring to the fore.

Ratatouille got an Oscar nomination for sound affects! This is the ONLY movie I saw of all the ones nominated and then I only saw it because it was animated and that granddaughter thing. But hey, I got excited just like a silly fool those Hollywood types think we all are, insert wink here.

I absolutely LOVE that McDonald’s commercial with the little kid eating Chicken Nuggets in time to happening rap music. Yes this commercial might have been around before the Oscars of 2008 but it’s the first time I saw it and a snippet is included in the video remix below that yon readers might enjoy it too. I don’t suppose McDonalds would get mad at me for giving them free ad time to two or three readers as visit this Blog every day.

So what’s with all the foreign stuff? Is America’s most precious and revered award show now part of a “globalization” and diversity movement that’s all the rage? Because all night I saw lots of foreign actors, actresses, film snippets and in general a passel of foreign stuff that only annoyed me. But hey, I didn’t change the channel but keep it up and soon I will. One actor accepted his Oscar and launched into a long Spanish narrative that left me falling asleep. The Oscar folks should wait until the illegal immigrants take over this country completely before chasing us all off with a boring award show in a completely different language.

Finally, Tilda Swinton… What’s up with that?

On to the fine pic montages and a video remix of the best song nominees for Oscar 2008 including a snippet of the cute McDonald commercial.










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FOCUS ON MOVIES
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"Brokeback Mountain" was heavily hyped as a homosexual film. Which it was. I found the relationship with one of the film's protagonists and his daughter to be more revealing about the character than any same-sex relationship depicted.

Tom Cruise's love is featured in "First Daughter", a film about, well, a first daughter. Only totally not believable.

"Chicken Little" is an animated film about, well something about a sky falling. Kaitlyn Mae watched this movie six times in one weekend. Read why this movie appeals to children so.

This post features reviews of BOTH "Poseidon" movies. The best one chosen might surprise.

He was born a rat but he wanted to be a chef. Here's a review of a charming animated film that will capture the imagination of both your children and ...YOU! Ratatouille

The bees were mad that humans were harvesting and profiting from sales of their honey and they weren't going to take it anymore. It's a cartoon the kids will love but there's a message in the movie that transcends all eras since the Garden of Eden.The Bee Movie

It was almost forty years ago that a record exploded upon the Pop culture that was sung by, ahem, CHIPMUNKS! Indeed my 4 year old granddaughter could not know that her grandmother listened to the feature song in this movie which brings the tale of the three hapless chipmunks to life as but a young girl her own self.

To Kaitlyn Mae, this was a movie about cute little chipmunks who became singing sensations. The tale involves evil record producers, kind but confused songwriters, and a bit of a love story.

Alvin is still as bad as ever.Alvin and the Chipmunks
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